Rewrite an Iconic Movie Scene Starring an RMer

[CopperTom]

RM: The Movie needs to happen.

Who would you cast to play CopperTom?

Either Joey Chestnut or Abbi Jacobson

Please cast all the major roles.

Dct = Aziz Anzari

Verb = Harvey Weinstein

Strat = Hugh Grant
Crackpot = Robert Downey

[BurtReynolds]

Strat seems like an Owen Wilson

[wease]

Crackpot = Robert Downey

That’s kind of a stretch.

[CopperTom]

Burt Reynolds = Bob Ross

[epilogue]

None of these casting choices feel right.

[CopperTom]

None of these casting choices feel right.

That's what makes them right.

[epilogue]

None of these casting choices feel right.

That's what makes them right.

[tree_]

(RMers are sitting by a dead tree)

DEV: Look, LENNYTHEWEEDWHACKER, first I say, "what we gonna do?" and then you say, "I donno what you wanna do?",
then I say, "what we gonna do?", you say "watcha wanna do", "what you gonna do", "what you wanna" - let's do something!

LENNYTHEWEEDWHACKER: Okay. What you wanna do?

DEV: Oh, blimey, there you go again. The same once again!

NUMBERSUP: I've got it! This time, I've really got it.

DEV: So you got it. So what we gonna do?

TRAG: Hold it lads. Look, look what's coming our way.

LENNYTHEWEEDWHACKER: Hey, what in the world is that?

NUMBERSUP: What a lonely, friendless looking bunch of bones.

TRAG: Yeah, and they’re all walking about by themselves

[TREE_ enters RM and sits by a stone)

LENNYTHEWEEDWHACKER: So what we gonna do?

DEV: I don't know-- and now don't start that again!

NUMBERSUP: Come on lads, come on let's have some fun with this little fella, this little Blokey? (They all go towards TREE_)

LENNYTHEWEEDWHACKER: Blimey, he's got legs like a storky.

DEV: Like a stork, heh-heh, but he ain't got no feathers. (RMers laugh)

TREE_: Go ahead. Laugh. I don't care. (He starts to walk off)

TRAG: What's wrong with him?

LENNYTHEWEEDWHACKER: I think we overdid it.

TRAG: We were just having a bit of fun that's all.

DEV: Just look at him. What a poor little fella. You know, he must be down on his luck.

TRAG: Yeah, or he wouldn't be in our neighborhood.

DEV: Hey, new kid, wait a minute, hey!

TREE_: Just leave me alone.

DEV: Oh, come on, come on, what's wrong? You know, you look like you haven't got a friend in the
world.

TREE_: I haven't.

TRAG: Haven't you got a mother or a father?

TREE_: No. Nobody wants me around.

DEV: Yeah, we know how you feel.

LENNYTHEWEEDWHACKER: Nobody wants me around, either.

DEV: We may look a bit shabby, but we've got hearts.

TRAG: And feelings, too.

DEV: And just to prove it to you, we're gonna let you join our little group.

LENNYTHEWEEDWHACKER: Kid, we'd like to make you an honorary RMer.

TREE_: Thanks, but I'd rather be on my own alone.

DEV: Uh, now look, kid, everybody's got to have friends. Hey, fellas, are we his friends?

*Song: That’s what Friends are For*

[epilogue]

Which movie is that from? I don't recognize it.

[tree_]

[epilogue]

It's been forever since I've seen that movie. High time I revisited.

[tree_]

It's been forever since I've seen that movie. High time I revisited.

Yeah, me too. As a young child, I used to fall asleep to this movie all the time at my grandma's house. I get a little sleepy just thinking about it.

[epilogue]

It's been forever since I've seen that movie. High time I revisited.

Yeah, me too. As a young child, I used to fall asleep to this movie all the time at my grandma's house. I get a little sleepy just thinking about it.

Same thing happens with me and episodes of MASH.

[tree_]

It's been forever since I've seen that movie. High time I revisited.

Yeah, me too. As a young child, I used to fall asleep to this movie all the time at my grandma's house. I get a little sleepy just thinking about it.

Same thing happens with me and episodes of MASH.

That MASH theme song makes me sleepy, too.

[epilogue]

It's been forever since I've seen that movie. High time I revisited.

Yeah, me too. As a young child, I used to fall asleep to this movie all the time at my grandma's house. I get a little sleepy just thinking about it.

Same thing happens with me and episodes of MASH.

That MASH theme song makes me sleepy, too.

It used to come on right after Star Trek: The Next Generation when I was a kid. My mom would let me stay up to watch TNG but as soon as MASH came on and I heard that song, it meant it was time to go to bed. As such it still makes me tired when I hear it.

[---]

this thread needs a proper jwfockering post haste

[---]

It's been forever since I've seen that movie. High time I revisited.

Yeah, me too. As a young child, I used to fall asleep to this movie all the time at my grandma's house. I get a little sleepy just thinking about it.

Same thing happens with me and episodes of MASH.

That MASH theme song makes me sleepy, too.

It used to come on right after Star Trek: The Next Generation when I was a kid. My mom would let me stay up to watch TNG but as soon as MASH came on and I heard that song, it meant it was time to go to bed. As such it still makes me tired when I hear it.

would you put Data's sentience at or above that of the tree_ account's?

[tree_]

It's been forever since I've seen that movie. High time I revisited.

Yeah, me too. As a young child, I used to fall asleep to this movie all the time at my grandma's house. I get a little sleepy just thinking about it.

Same thing happens with me and episodes of MASH.

That MASH theme song makes me sleepy, too.

It used to come on right after Star Trek: The Next Generation when I was a kid. My mom would let me stay up to watch TNG but as soon as MASH came on and I heard that song, it meant it was time to go to bed. As such it still makes me tired when I hear it.

would you put Data's sentience at or above that of the tree_ account's?

tree_ account's experience is about as subjective as it gets, bub.

[epilogue]

It's been forever since I've seen that movie. High time I revisited.

Yeah, me too. As a young child, I used to fall asleep to this movie all the time at my grandma's house. I get a little sleepy just thinking about it.

Same thing happens with me and episodes of MASH.

That MASH theme song makes me sleepy, too.

It used to come on right after Star Trek: The Next Generation when I was a kid. My mom would let me stay up to watch TNG but as soon as MASH came on and I heard that song, it meant it was time to go to bed. As such it still makes me tired when I hear it.

would you put Data's sentience at or above that of the tree_ account's?

tree_ account's experience is about as subjective as it gets, bub.

I was gonna say "at" but then I read this reply... and now I'm not so sure.

[tree_]

It's been forever since I've seen that movie. High time I revisited.

Yeah, me too. As a young child, I used to fall asleep to this movie all the time at my grandma's house. I get a little sleepy just thinking about it.

Same thing happens with me and episodes of MASH.

That MASH theme song makes me sleepy, too.

It used to come on right after Star Trek: The Next Generation when I was a kid. My mom would let me stay up to watch TNG but as soon as MASH came on and I heard that song, it meant it was time to go to bed. As such it still makes me tired when I hear it.

would you put Data's sentience at or above that of the tree_ account's?

tree_ account's experience is about as subjective as it gets, bub.

I was gonna say "at" but then I read this reply... and now I'm not so sure.

This sorta unnecessary cruelty is why I didn't put you in the script and considered extending it and making you Shere Khan.. but you're not strong enough for his role and I couldn't figure out who would fit...