R.I.P.
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jwfocker
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Re: R.I.P.
What it should do, in my mind, is compound how tragic his passing is and offer a bit more context to how much pain he was in.
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Re: R.I.P.
RIP Anthony Bourdain
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Re: R.I.P.
RIP
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Re: R.I.P.
Is it not cruel that his daughter will now have to grow up without a father? I’m not trying to shame him. He obviously had troubles and pains, but ultimately, this was a selfish act that robbed his daughter of her father. I hate that it happened, but that was the path HE chose. Not his daughter. It’s no different than when my wife’s cousin killed himself a year ago. Left behind 2 kids both under the age of 6. That wasn’t fair to either one of them and you can’t convince me that any problem was so big that the only answer was to rob any of these kids of their father.LoathedVermin72 wrote:Ugh. I hate this “selfish act” bullshit people throw around with suicide. It is so backwards and callous to see someone who was in pain commit suicide and react by shaming them for forsaking what you think their obligations should be. Fuck that. It’s borderline cruel.Balki wrote:Not what, voice our opinions? It's a selfish act, LV. You're entitled to take a different opinion.LoathedVermin72 wrote:Can we please notwease wrote:Yeah, this is the part that bothers me the most.Balki wrote:He leaves behind an 11 year old daughter, right? I liked you, Anthony Bourdain, but I don't like your decision to abandon your daughter at this point in her life
And their obligations absolutely SHOULD be their kids. You make that obligation when you have them.
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Re: R.I.P.
We talk about this EVERY TIME someone kills themselves.theplatypus wrote:I think we talked about all this back when Cornell died.
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Re: R.I.P.
Such a narrow view on why a human being commits suicide. That poor girl will have to deal with the consequences of not having his father around. Its her plea. To think its a selfish act when you are not even involved in the family circle is just weird man.wease wrote:Is it not cruel that his daughter will now have to grow up without a father? I’m not trying to shame him. He obviously had troubles and pains, but ultimately, this was a selfish act that robbed his daughter of her father. I hate that it happened, but that was the path HE chose. Not his daughter. It’s no different than when my wife’s cousin killed himself a year ago. Left behind 2 kids both under the age of 6. That wasn’t fair to either one of them and you can’t convince me that any problem was so big that the only answer was to rob any of these kids of their father.LoathedVermin72 wrote:Ugh. I hate this “selfish act” bullshit people throw around with suicide. It is so backwards and callous to see someone who was in pain commit suicide and react by shaming them for forsaking what you think their obligations should be. Fuck that. It’s borderline cruel.Balki wrote:Not what, voice our opinions? It's a selfish act, LV. You're entitled to take a different opinion.LoathedVermin72 wrote:Can we please notwease wrote:Yeah, this is the part that bothers me the most.Balki wrote:He leaves behind an 11 year old daughter, right? I liked you, Anthony Bourdain, but I don't like your decision to abandon your daughter at this point in her life
And their obligations absolutely SHOULD be their kids. You make that obligation when you have them.
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Re: R.I.P.
The idea that people should just dedicate their lives to their kids is so fucking stupid.
If you can't see that people need more in their lives than that to function and find joy, then you clearly have no understanding of human beings.
If you can't see that people need more in their lives than that to function and find joy, then you clearly have no understanding of human beings.
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Re: R.I.P.
No one said people didn’t need more in their lives. Certainly, we all do. I sure do. But to suggest parents don’t have obligations to their kids is ludicrous.run2death wrote:The idea that people should just dedicate their lives to their kids is so fucking stupid.
If you can't see that people need more in their lives than that to function and find joy, then you clearly have no understanding of human beings.
Let me tell you, Homer Simpson is cock of nothing!
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Re: R.I.P.
Wee don't even know what his relationship with his daughter was, so saying it was selfish is actually a selfish thing to say. Assuming his relationship was similar to yours with your children is what you are doing.
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Re: R.I.P.
yeah he'd probably already abandoned her so nbdE.H. Ruddock wrote:Wee don't even know what his relationship with his daughter was, so saying it was selfish is actually a selfish thing to say. Assuming his relationship was similar to yours with your children is what you are doing.
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Re: R.I.P.
I don’t know. It just seems to me that the act itself is one that is taken without regard of the consequences it will have on others. He certainly could have weighed each option and decided everything would be better off without him. Interviews I’ve read and videos I’ve seen where he talks about his kid would suggest otherwise, but I absolutely do not know what was going on in his head before it happened.VinylGuy wrote:Such a narrow view on why a human being commits suicide. That poor girl will have to deal with the consequences of not having his father around. Its her plea. To think its a selfish act when you are not even involved in the family circle is just weird man.wease wrote:Is it not cruel that his daughter will now have to grow up without a father? I’m not trying to shame him. He obviously had troubles and pains, but ultimately, this was a selfish act that robbed his daughter of her father. I hate that it happened, but that was the path HE chose. Not his daughter. It’s no different than when my wife’s cousin killed himself a year ago. Left behind 2 kids both under the age of 6. That wasn’t fair to either one of them and you can’t convince me that any problem was so big that the only answer was to rob any of these kids of their father.LoathedVermin72 wrote:Ugh. I hate this “selfish act” bullshit people throw around with suicide. It is so backwards and callous to see someone who was in pain commit suicide and react by shaming them for forsaking what you think their obligations should be. Fuck that. It’s borderline cruel.Balki wrote:Not what, voice our opinions? It's a selfish act, LV. You're entitled to take a different opinion.LoathedVermin72 wrote:Can we please notwease wrote:Yeah, this is the part that bothers me the most.Balki wrote:He leaves behind an 11 year old daughter, right? I liked you, Anthony Bourdain, but I don't like your decision to abandon your daughter at this point in her life
And their obligations absolutely SHOULD be their kids. You make that obligation when you have them.
I’m sorry this got turned into some kind of argument. We all seem to be fans of his. It just bothers me that a kid lost a parent. The facts are he killed himself and that sucks and he left behind a daughter and that sucks, too.
Let me tell you, Homer Simpson is cock of nothing!
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Re: R.I.P.
Perhaps. As I just mentioned, I’ve read interviews and seen videos where he seemed to truly love being a parent. But, you’re right. We really don’t have a clue as to what their relationship was.E.H. Ruddock wrote:Wee don't even know what his relationship with his daughter was, so saying it was selfish is actually a selfish thing to say. Assuming his relationship was similar to yours with your children is what you are doing.
Let me tell you, Homer Simpson is cock of nothing!
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Re: R.I.P.
This is what depression does to your brain, though.wease wrote:I don’t know. It just seems to me that the act itself is one that is taken without regard of the consequences it will have on others. He certainly could have weighed each option and decided everything would be better off without him. Interviews I’ve read and videos I’ve seen where he talks about his kid would suggest otherwise, but I absolutely do not know what was going on in his head before it happened.VinylGuy wrote:Such a narrow view on why a human being commits suicide. That poor girl will have to deal with the consequences of not having his father around. Its her plea. To think its a selfish act when you are not even involved in the family circle is just weird man.wease wrote:Is it not cruel that his daughter will now have to grow up without a father? I’m not trying to shame him. He obviously had troubles and pains, but ultimately, this was a selfish act that robbed his daughter of her father. I hate that it happened, but that was the path HE chose. Not his daughter. It’s no different than when my wife’s cousin killed himself a year ago. Left behind 2 kids both under the age of 6. That wasn’t fair to either one of them and you can’t convince me that any problem was so big that the only answer was to rob any of these kids of their father.LoathedVermin72 wrote:Ugh. I hate this “selfish act” bullshit people throw around with suicide. It is so backwards and callous to see someone who was in pain commit suicide and react by shaming them for forsaking what you think their obligations should be. Fuck that. It’s borderline cruel.Balki wrote:Not what, voice our opinions? It's a selfish act, LV. You're entitled to take a different opinion.LoathedVermin72 wrote:Can we please notwease wrote:Yeah, this is the part that bothers me the most.Balki wrote:He leaves behind an 11 year old daughter, right? I liked you, Anthony Bourdain, but I don't like your decision to abandon your daughter at this point in her life
And their obligations absolutely SHOULD be their kids. You make that obligation when you have them.
I’m sorry this got turned into some kind of argument. We all seem to be fans of his. It just bothers me that a kid lost a parent. The facts are he killed himself and that sucks and he left behind a daughter and that sucks, too.
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Re: R.I.P.
Fair point.LoathedVermin72 wrote:This is what depression does to your brain, though.wease wrote:I don’t know. It just seems to me that the act itself is one that is taken without regard of the consequences it will have on others. He certainly could have weighed each option and decided everything would be better off without him. Interviews I’ve read and videos I’ve seen where he talks about his kid would suggest otherwise, but I absolutely do not know what was going on in his head before it happened.VinylGuy wrote:Such a narrow view on why a human being commits suicide. That poor girl will have to deal with the consequences of not having his father around. Its her plea. To think its a selfish act when you are not even involved in the family circle is just weird man.wease wrote:Is it not cruel that his daughter will now have to grow up without a father? I’m not trying to shame him. He obviously had troubles and pains, but ultimately, this was a selfish act that robbed his daughter of her father. I hate that it happened, but that was the path HE chose. Not his daughter. It’s no different than when my wife’s cousin killed himself a year ago. Left behind 2 kids both under the age of 6. That wasn’t fair to either one of them and you can’t convince me that any problem was so big that the only answer was to rob any of these kids of their father.LoathedVermin72 wrote:Ugh. I hate this “selfish act” bullshit people throw around with suicide. It is so backwards and callous to see someone who was in pain commit suicide and react by shaming them for forsaking what you think their obligations should be. Fuck that. It’s borderline cruel.Balki wrote:Not what, voice our opinions? It's a selfish act, LV. You're entitled to take a different opinion.LoathedVermin72 wrote:Can we please notwease wrote:Yeah, this is the part that bothers me the most.Balki wrote:He leaves behind an 11 year old daughter, right? I liked you, Anthony Bourdain, but I don't like your decision to abandon your daughter at this point in her life
And their obligations absolutely SHOULD be their kids. You make that obligation when you have them.
I’m sorry this got turned into some kind of argument. We all seem to be fans of his. It just bothers me that a kid lost a parent. The facts are he killed himself and that sucks and he left behind a daughter and that sucks, too.
Let me tell you, Homer Simpson is cock of nothing!
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Re: R.I.P.
These are the same kind of people who think everyone will have kids eventually. No matter what you try and tell them.run2death wrote:The idea that people should just dedicate their lives to their kids is so fucking stupid.
If you can't see that people need more in their lives than that to function and find joy, then you clearly have no understanding of human beings.
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Re: R.I.P.
Why can't it be both?
When you take a job you don't just leave in the middle of the shift. You have taken on an obligation. That has nothing to do with the "complete devotion to your kids" mindset. Even if you hate that job, the right thing is to finish it or at least leave in a professional fashion. That's part of the responsibility you took on when you took the job.. and in this case taking the job is making the decision to have kids- especially later in life like Bourdain's is.
But that doesn't make him a coward or selfish. But it something that is the real tragic part of it- and thats immaterial as to what his relationship with his daughter is. I can tell you on a number of occasions that my obligation to be a father and be there for my children has stopped my brain from taking me very dark places.
When you take a job you don't just leave in the middle of the shift. You have taken on an obligation. That has nothing to do with the "complete devotion to your kids" mindset. Even if you hate that job, the right thing is to finish it or at least leave in a professional fashion. That's part of the responsibility you took on when you took the job.. and in this case taking the job is making the decision to have kids- especially later in life like Bourdain's is.
But that doesn't make him a coward or selfish. But it something that is the real tragic part of it- and thats immaterial as to what his relationship with his daughter is. I can tell you on a number of occasions that my obligation to be a father and be there for my children has stopped my brain from taking me very dark places.
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jwfocker
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Re: R.I.P.
I wish it was as black and white as that.
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Re: R.I.P.
If I think about, there's probably no other entertainer who had more impact on our home. We have his books on our coffee table. Watched his shows religiously. We cooked as a family fairly regularly because of him. Tried every Vietnamese place within a 100-mile radius, even going down to Tucson a couple of times.