Describe your neighbors IN DETAIL

[washing machine]

We never buy anything. Their weekly sales are more of a consignment situation, though.

[Dev]

There is this single mom with 2 maybe 20 year old kids and the boy is fucking weird. I asked him if he had an air compressor I could borrow this morning and I just can't even explain the interaction.

[BurtReynolds]

Try

[Jorge]

Neighbor across the hall is a lovely woman in her 60s or early 70s who lives alone. I fucked her in the ass!

Apartment next to mine is empty.

Further down the hall is a young couple. This really attractive woman and a dorky looking dude. They live with a little dog. I fucked the three of them in the ass!

[Ello Sailor]

Jorge

[Mother]

Living in a beautiful caravan park in SW Western Australia for the past 6 years which has 50+ permanents....Trailer Trash right here

Neighbour 2 doors down - Mrs is OCD and a whole range of other disorders, rarely leaves their compound, takes 8 dexies a day, Seroquel to sleep, as well as a variety of other prescription drugs incl Oxycontin. Drinks Vodka from lunchtime onwards and smokes heaps of weed. Has a high pitched, LOUD, irritating voice and is best avoided. Hubby is a screaming alcoholic who is partially deaf and despite their apparent wealth, is short most of his teeth. He operates a lot of power tools, mostly so he can't hear his wife. I've mastered the art of the walking wave, say Hello but never ask how they're going after learning the hard way.

[Bammer]

How close does someone have to be so that I consider them a neighbor? Our neighborhood is technically several dozen square blocks at least.

[washing machine]

Don't overthink it, bammer.

[knee tunes]

I could only do this properly by a compilation video perhaps, with some still pics thrown in, maybe some captions. Even then . it wouldn't capture it...
But I suppose I could try

[spike]

Our other shared wall neighbor in the city has been a ghost for months. Rumor is she’s prepping to sell and move full time to her vacation place in Indiana. I’m assuming her role became permanent WFH during Covid, allowing this. If true, hoping the new owners are cool.

The place next to hers was recently sold by some problem owners. The wife would always leave the shared garage door open, which is a big theft risk. After repeated friendly reminders from the board, she finally went off on everyone and said we were all unfriendly and never stopped to chat. This was during a pandemic, mind you. I actually stopped and chatted with her several times, but whatever. Her husband was worse… as he suggested a big HOA loan for roof and fire escapes repairs, when we traditionally just do special assessments for this stuff. Then, after agreeing to research such loans, he half assed it and delayed things, then they ended up selling. At least got word that he had to escrow like $20k for these future repairs… because I think he thought he’d get out of them and stick the new owners with them.

[doug rr]

i had a hard time reading past a vacation home in indiana...

[Strat]

i had a hard time reading past a vacation home in indiana...

same

[dad]

facing the street, the neighbor to our immediate right is a divorcee, who filed because she'd been fucking one of her coworkers. my wife found out one night when the neighbor was at our house, having a glass of wine, and texting and smiling/giggling. my wife flat out asked her if she was cheating on her husband. i kind of feel bad for her husband. he seemed like a nice enough guy. i think they met when they were mid-20s, settled on each other, and started a family. they have two little girls, a 7 or 8yo, and a 4yo. our kids get along. the ex-husband is currently being catfished by someone, but we don't have the heart to tell him.

the house to their immediate right is a guy who--used to be a regional mgr?--for starbucks. super nice guy, always working on some type of project in his yard, or garage, just getting after it. i wish i had that kind of eagerness.

a couple of doors down from him is a guy going through a divorce. his wife left him, possibly for someone else? dunno. she got braces and a little more skinny than she already was. i just know he's kind of a dickhead who talked to me like he was better than me because he went to church. just very condescending to me and my fam. i'm sure he was a dick to his soon-to-be ex-wife. they have two girls as well.

neighbors to our immediate left moved in just after covid hit. they're a couple...probably close in age to me. she's ex-air force...him too. he works for cox cable. we rarely interact with them. most of the time i see them get food delivered. to their left is a guy who works for the gov--same org as me. nice guy, wife, two daughters. he goes on lots of motorcycle rides. each year he rides with a group of friends starting at the southeast corner of oklahoma, and they ride along the border of ok/arkansas. it's a bigfoot ride or something. he likes bigfoot. oh, also, he's won competitions for firearm trick shooting.

all the other neighbors i've interacted with at the pool or while taking the dog for a walk. maybe i'll mention them later, like the dude who lives by the neighborhood pool and is always trying to invite me to church or a church outing.

i guess i give off such a non-believer vibe.

[spike]

i had a hard time reading past a vacation home in indiana...

same

Haha, I think there are some nice lakes and land just south of the Michigan border. The eastern side of Lake Michigan is quite nice, so just an extension of that.

[knee tunes]

My next door neighbor is a cashier at Walmart.

I just got this text from her:

"A guy took a shit in my line"

[BurtReynolds]

New crazy homeless bum in the area. Most of them are harmless, but this guy gives me the creeps. He's young, too. Might be worth keeping an eye on. Looks like he might snap.

[E.H. Ruddock]

I hope the girl with no pants stays away from him

[BurtReynolds]

They might be working together.

[spike]

They might be working together.

Against you???

[tragabigzanda]

There is a wolf in me . . . fangs pointed for tearing gashes . . . a red tongue for raw meat . . . and the hot lapping of blood—I keep this wolf because the wilderness gave it to me and the wilderness will not let it go.

There is a fox in me . . . a silver-gray fox . . . I sniff and guess . . . I pick things out of the wind and air . . . I nose in the dark night and take sleepers and eat them and hide the feathers . . . I circle and loop and double-cross.

There is a hog in me . . . a snout and a belly . . . a machinery for eating and grunting . . . a machinery for sleeping satisfied in the sun—I got this too from the wilderness and the wilderness will not let it go.

There is a fish in me . . . I know I came from salt-blue water-gates . . . I scurried with shoals of herring . . . I blew waterspouts with porpoises . . . before land was . . . before the water went down . . . before Noah . . . before the first chapter of Genesis.

There is a baboon in me . . . clambering-clawed . . . dog-faced . . . yawping a galoot's hunger . . . hairy under the armpits . . . here are the hawk-eyed hankering men . . . here are the blonde and blue-eyed women . . . here they hide curled asleep waiting . . . ready to snarl and kill . . . ready to sing and give milk . . . waiting—I keep the baboon because the wilderness says so.

There is an eagle in me and a mockingbird . . . and the eagle flies among the Rocky Mountains of my dreams and fights among the Sierra crags of what I want . . . and the mockingbird warbles in the early forenoon before the dew is gone, warbles in the underbrush of my Chattanoogas of hope, gushes over the blue Ozark foothills of my wishes—And I got the eagle and the mockingbird from the wilderness.

O, I got a zoo, I got a menagerie, inside my ribs, under my bony head, under my red-valve heart—and I got something else: it is a man-child heart, a woman-child heart: it is a father and mother and lover: it came from God-Knows-Where: it is going to God-Knows-Where—For I am the keeper of the zoo: I say yes and no: I sing and kill and work: I am a pal of the world: I came from the wilderness.