America..why won't you just ban the fucking gun?

[Mickey]

[Bo Burnham voice] "Tattooed white Soundcloud rapper mass shooting on the 4th"

[Rangi Guy]

This is the guy they are looking for

Is that a scar, tattoo or does is eyebrow just keep going down his face?

[spike]

POI appears to have been apprehended.

[E.H. Ruddock]

Good thing they took him alive and didn’t shoot 60 rounds into him

[spike]

Now reports of an active shooter situation at the fireworks in downtown Philadelphia.

Starting to feel like we’re firmly in the gets worse before it gets better phase, assuming it does get better.

[elliseamos]

246 years is a good run.

Let's see what the robots have in mind.

[Mickey]

Now reports of an active shooter situation at the fireworks in downtown Philadelphia.

Starting to feel like we’re firmly in the gets worse before it gets better phase, assuming it does get better.

Two cops shot, shooter still at large. We're pretty close to the parkway, about a minute after we heard the news a man rode down our block on horseback.

[Peeps]

Are we sure the Chicago shooter isn’t dj qualls?

[B]

Good thing they took him alive and didn’t shoot 60 rounds into him

We'll, it's not like he was an unarmed black man.

[elliseamos]

[elliseamos]

Good thing they took him alive and didn’t shoot 60 rounds into him

We'll, it's not like he was an unarmed black man.

[Stickman]

‘Let’s Move On’: Republicans Prove Once Again They’re Beyond Caring About Mass Shootings

[Bi_3]

Good thing they took him alive and didn’t shoot 60 rounds into him

We'll, it's not like he was an unarmed black man.

If you all had even bothered to read the facts around the tragedy in Akron you would understand why the results are different.

[BurtReynolds]

Is the idea that police have sympathy with mass shooters, and wouldn't relish the opportunity to blast them into a million pieces?

[B]

Is the idea that police have sympathy with mass shooters, and wouldn't relish the opportunity to blast them into a million pieces?

I'm sure they don't have sympathy. The idea is that police are capable of restraint. We should train for it, demand it, reward it, and prosecute the lack of it.

[E.H. Ruddock]

Good thing they took him alive and didn’t shoot 60 rounds into him

We'll, it's not like he was an unarmed black man.

If you all had even bothered to read the facts around the tragedy in Akron you would understand why the results are different.

Do you mean because the man in Akron fired at police? Well, the guy at the parade fired at innocent people. And killed them.

[spike]

Good thing they took him alive and didn’t shoot 60 rounds into him

We'll, it's not like he was an unarmed black man.

If you all had even bothered to read the facts around the tragedy in Akron you would understand why the results are different.

Do you mean because the man in Akron fired at police? Well, the guy at the parade fired at innocent people. And killed them.

If every situation or result is “not comparable,” then they can’t possibly be rooted in the same big problem, and the problem ceases to exist.

[Bi_3]

Do you mean because the man in Akron fired at police? Well, the guy at the parade fired at innocent people. And killed them.

That's certainly part of it. One had tried to speed away from a traffic stop for the second time in 24 hours, shot at the police, disobeyed commands to surrender, jumped out of his car and fled, they tried to taser him and that didnt work, then he went suicide by cop. The other was a person of interest at the time and did not resist when stopped (though they did have a short low speed car chase). They did not know he was the shooter at the time, versus someone who had literally shot at them a few minutes beforehand.

If every situation or result is “not comparable,” then they can’t possibly be rooted in the same big problem, and the problem ceases to exist.

[BurtReynolds]

Good thing they took him alive and didn’t shoot 60 rounds into him

We'll, it's not like he was an unarmed black man.

If you all had even bothered to read the facts around the tragedy in Akron you would understand why the results are different.

Do you mean because the man in Akron fired at police? Well, the guy at the parade fired at innocent people. And killed them.

So why do you think they treated him differently?

[B]

Do you mean because the man in Akron fired at police? Well, the guy at the parade fired at innocent people. And killed them.

That's certainly part of it. One had tried to speed away from a traffic stop for the second time in 24 hours, shot at the police, disobeyed commands to surrender, jumped out of his car and fled, they tried to taser him and that didnt work, then he went suicide by cop. The other was a person of interest at the time and did not resist when stopped (though they did have a short low speed car chase). They did not know he was the shooter at the time, versus someone who had literally shot at them a few minutes beforehand.

I'm not really sure when running away from the police became suicide by cop.

Otherwise, you did a great job of making the mass murder sound like a gentleman, and the black Uber driver sound like a mass murder.