Imagine you’ve got a Time Machine

[lennytheweedwhacker]

The trouble with the future is we don’t know when this whole shit show is gonna end. So you may appear in a time when no humans are around, and suddenly you’re being burned by acid rain and having to eat dirt.

This would actually be an improvement for Lenny

Your mom would be an improvement for me.

[Anders]

You don’t become a younger version of yourself with a time machine, you stay your current age, and keep aging normally, wherever you go.

well that sounds pointless and bad

You can travel anywhere in time. It’s still your current self, but you can go to any place in time ever.

[tragabigzanda]

There is a wolf in me . . . fangs pointed for tearing gashes . . . a red tongue for raw meat . . . and the hot lapping of blood—I keep this wolf because the wilderness gave it to me and the wilderness will not let it go.

There is a fox in me . . . a silver-gray fox . . . I sniff and guess . . . I pick things out of the wind and air . . . I nose in the dark night and take sleepers and eat them and hide the feathers . . . I circle and loop and double-cross.

There is a hog in me . . . a snout and a belly . . . a machinery for eating and grunting . . . a machinery for sleeping satisfied in the sun—I got this too from the wilderness and the wilderness will not let it go.

There is a fish in me . . . I know I came from salt-blue water-gates . . . I scurried with shoals of herring . . . I blew waterspouts with porpoises . . . before land was . . . before the water went down . . . before Noah . . . before the first chapter of Genesis.

There is a baboon in me . . . clambering-clawed . . . dog-faced . . . yawping a galoot's hunger . . . hairy under the armpits . . . here are the hawk-eyed hankering men . . . here are the blonde and blue-eyed women . . . here they hide curled asleep waiting . . . ready to snarl and kill . . . ready to sing and give milk . . . waiting—I keep the baboon because the wilderness says so.

There is an eagle in me and a mockingbird . . . and the eagle flies among the Rocky Mountains of my dreams and fights among the Sierra crags of what I want . . . and the mockingbird warbles in the early forenoon before the dew is gone, warbles in the underbrush of my Chattanoogas of hope, gushes over the blue Ozark foothills of my wishes—And I got the eagle and the mockingbird from the wilderness.

O, I got a zoo, I got a menagerie, inside my ribs, under my bony head, under my red-valve heart—and I got something else: it is a man-child heart, a woman-child heart: it is a father and mother and lover: it came from God-Knows-Where: it is going to God-Knows-Where—For I am the keeper of the zoo: I say yes and no: I sing and kill and work: I am a pal of the world: I came from the wilderness.

[Malloy]

I would travel back in time to last night, to follow the "Tommy sent me some pictures of dead bodies" - thread live.

direct me to this thread, please and thank you

[tree_]

I would travel back in time to last night, to follow the "Tommy sent me some pictures of dead bodies" - thread live.

direct me to this thread, please and thank you

I would tell you all about it but I don’t want to B banned

[bodysnatcher]

I would travel back to when B thought his 2022 April Fools joke was a good idea

[Bammer]

I would travel back to when B thought his 2022 April Fools joke was a good idea

And have him kill the whole board, not just GD.

[wease's ex-girlfriend]

All of you dummies saying you'd go back in time. That is just fucking dumb. Why not go to the future where you can see if we've unlocked secrets of the universe? Intergalactic travel, alien contact, etc. Who cares about whether or not Hitler dies earlier or Jesus turned bread into wine or whatever.

[tree_]

All of you dummies saying you'd go back in time. That is just fucking dumb. Why not go to the future where you can see if we've unlocked secrets of the universe? Intergalactic travel, alien contact, etc. Who cares about whether or not Hitler dies earlier or Jesus turned bread into wine or whatever.

as i said before, you could end up in a future of nothing but hellfire and immediately die.. not worth the risk

[spike]

What if you underwent a gender reassignment procedure, then went back in time? Could you coexist with your past self then?

[bodysnatcher]

You’d cancel each other out and therefore not exist at all

[spike]

i'm going to need you to show your work

[tree_]

yeah what's your reasoning behind that idea?

[spike]

some real goofballs around here, huh tree?

[dad]

i would go back in time a la biff tannen, and bet large amounts of money on sporting events, bury the money for my future self, and use the winnings to buy a social media platform, let people spread misinformation, sit back and collect more money.

i would also travel forward to workshop really bad ideas on internet message boards.

[bodysnatcher]

I’d go back and make myself and family rich for sure. Fuck humanity, no matter what you’d do to try and better it, they’d just fuck that up too.

[wease]

i would go back in time a la biff tannen, and bet large amounts of money on sporting events, bury the money for my future self…

This. Then I’d just live on Easy Street for the rest of my days.

[96583UP]

i would have bought bitcoin at $1