The poop thread. (a thread, mostly, for bodysnatcher)

[dad]

I feel like I’m due for a nice hearty poop.

get some carrot juice

Surely, I could get the same from eating whole carrots.

go with the juice..its not carrot season in Oklahoma

did you get this info from the farmer’s almanac?

[bodysnatcher]

I like to use a mandolin to thinly slice carrots and eat them like cereal

I call it seereal

[dad]

I like to use a mandolin to thinly slice carrots and eat them like cereal

I call it seereal

new dad level unlocked.

[bodysnatcher]

I like to use a mandolin to thinly slice carrots and eat them like cereal

I call it seereal

new dad level unlocked.

*clips phone to belt*

[spike]

I like to use a mandolin to thinly slice carrots and eat them like cereal

I call it seereal

new dad level unlocked.

*clips phone to belt*

*checks that cargo shorts are sufficiently wrinkly*

[lennytheweedwhacker]

I can't poop I just can't.

[dad]

I can't poop I just can't.

I haven't pooped since Wednesday, and I'm starting to wonder if I ever will again.

[lennytheweedwhacker]

I can't poop I just can't.

I haven't pooped since Wednesday, and I'm starting to wonder if I ever will again.

Praying for you and your butt.

[dad]

I can't poop I just can't.

I haven't pooped since Wednesday, and I'm starting to wonder if I ever will again.

Praying for you and your butt.

Hope you crap your butt soon too.

[lennytheweedwhacker]

I can't poop I just can't.

I haven't pooped since Wednesday, and I'm starting to wonder if I ever will again.

Praying for you and your butt.

Hope you crap your butt soon too.

Thanks bro. That really does mean a lot to me.

[knee tunes]

I feel like I’m due for a nice hearty poop.

get some carrot juice

Surely, I could get the same from eating whole carrots.

go with the juice..its not carrot season in Oklahoma

did you get this info from the farmer’s almanac?

Don't dis the almanac

[B]

Oh man, I just looked at the instructions for my fucking colonoscopy.

"A colon that is poorly 'prepped' may cause us to reschedule your procedure."

"Start drinking your Golytely prep solution. Drink one 8-ounce glass every 15-20 minutes until you have finished HALF of your entire Golytely container (2 liters). If working properly, you will begin to have bowel movements within 4 hours."

"NORMAL Prep Side Effects
Diarrhea
Bloating
Chills
Cramps
Nausea
Vomiting
Headache
Irritation of rectal area"

This is all before I even walk in the door.

[doug rr]

not going to lie...thats the worse part of the procedure..the rest is a cake walk

[bodysnatcher]

B should change his name to BM the day before his colonoscopy

[dad]

B should change his name to BM the day before his colonoscopy

I laughed.

[wease]

Oh man, I just looked at the instructions for my fucking colonoscopy.

"A colon that is poorly 'prepped' may cause us to reschedule your procedure."

"Start drinking your Golytely prep solution. Drink one 8-ounce glass every 15-20 minutes until you have finished HALF of your entire Golytely container (2 liters). If working properly, you will begin to have bowel movements within 4 hours."

"NORMAL Prep Side Effects
Diarrhea
Bloating
Chills
Cramps
Nausea
Vomiting
Headache
Irritation of rectal area"

This is all before I even walk in the door.

Within 4 hours isn’t entirely accurate… Technically, yes.

[JuanHamm]

I pooped once this morning, but it wasn't enough. I'm at work now and there's no toilet paper. Thankfully my coworker is bringing some, but it's going to be a tough wait.

[B]

I'm kind of imagining how colonoscopies started evolving.


"Hey, I tried sticking a camera up this guy's butt, but there so much shit in there, I don't know what I'm looking at."

"Well, my friend has this mild poison that might help you out!"

[JuanHamm]

Ask your butt doctor why he chose that field.

[B]

Ask your butt doctor why he chose that field.

There is no answer that I would find comforting.