What is Your Ideal Midlife Crisis?

[Coach]

If you answer 30 questions (takes a couple minutes) you will know for sure.

Mine:

Score: 33 percent

You might be experiencing a midlife crisis, but it's not very likely. You may have some regrets about your past, and may at times wish things could be different, but overall you're a calm and stable individual with a bright outlook and realistic goals.

To take test: https://www.gotoquiz.com/midlife_crisis_quiz

[tree_]

your link gives us your results

use this link: https://www.gotoquiz.com/midlife_crisis_quiz

[Coach]

your link gives us your results

use this link: https://www.gotoquiz.com/midlife_crisis_quiz

oh yes, thank you, and I need to correct my score, too.

[tree_]

i got 1%

now we need a quiz to discover how accurately we actually answer self-quiz questions

[Coach]

i got 1%

now we need a quiz to discover how accurately you actually answer self-quiz questions

Well, you are def not having a midlife crisis because quizzes found on Google search are Bible.

[tree_]

it probably just means i'm way past the halfway point of my life and probably going to die soon.. might as well go buy a sports car now

[spike]

Coach, the weight loss thread and 30 year old girlfriend gets you there.

[Coach]

Coach, the weight loss thread and 30 year old girlfriend gets you there.

Yes, on the surface, but in reality I only lost 15 pounds just to get back to where I've been my whole life.

And while she is 30, she is also a mom, so she's a mature 30, I think?

[Coach]

P.S. But thank you for giving the weight loss thread a shoutout!

[bodysnatcher]

Health wise, I was doing really good up until about age 44-1/2, and then, a bunch of little shit piled up like rosacea on my face, a stye on my eyelid that lasted three months only followed by popping a blood vessel in my other eye, which was harmless but left me with a red eye for another month or so.

Eye caramba

[Coach]

Health wise, I was doing really good up until about age 44-1/2, and then, a bunch of little shit piled up like rosacea on my face, a stye on my eyelid that lasted three months only followed by popping a blood vessel in my other eye, which was harmless but left me with a red eye for another month or so.

Eye caramba

Yeah, all from the rosacea. I have something called ocular rosacea, so it affects my skin and eyes. Fun times but I have it more under control now.

Eye Vey

[Higgs]

Health wise, I was doing really good up until about age 44-1/2, and then, a bunch of little shit piled up like rosacea on my face, a stye on my eyelid that lasted three months only followed by popping a blood vessel in my other eye, which was harmless but left me with a red eye for another month or so.

Eye caramba

Yeah, all from the rosacea. I have something called ocular rosacea, so it affects my skin and eyes. Fun times but I have it more under control now.

Eye Vey

Stye Go

[Bammer]

your link gives us your results

use this link: https://www.gotoquiz.com/midlife_crisis_quiz

0%

[tragabigzanda]

There is a wolf in me . . . fangs pointed for tearing gashes . . . a red tongue for raw meat . . . and the hot lapping of blood—I keep this wolf because the wilderness gave it to me and the wilderness will not let it go.

There is a fox in me . . . a silver-gray fox . . . I sniff and guess . . . I pick things out of the wind and air . . . I nose in the dark night and take sleepers and eat them and hide the feathers . . . I circle and loop and double-cross.

There is a hog in me . . . a snout and a belly . . . a machinery for eating and grunting . . . a machinery for sleeping satisfied in the sun—I got this too from the wilderness and the wilderness will not let it go.

There is a fish in me . . . I know I came from salt-blue water-gates . . . I scurried with shoals of herring . . . I blew waterspouts with porpoises . . . before land was . . . before the water went down . . . before Noah . . . before the first chapter of Genesis.

There is a baboon in me . . . clambering-clawed . . . dog-faced . . . yawping a galoot's hunger . . . hairy under the armpits . . . here are the hawk-eyed hankering men . . . here are the blonde and blue-eyed women . . . here they hide curled asleep waiting . . . ready to snarl and kill . . . ready to sing and give milk . . . waiting—I keep the baboon because the wilderness says so.

There is an eagle in me and a mockingbird . . . and the eagle flies among the Rocky Mountains of my dreams and fights among the Sierra crags of what I want . . . and the mockingbird warbles in the early forenoon before the dew is gone, warbles in the underbrush of my Chattanoogas of hope, gushes over the blue Ozark foothills of my wishes—And I got the eagle and the mockingbird from the wilderness.

O, I got a zoo, I got a menagerie, inside my ribs, under my bony head, under my red-valve heart—and I got something else: it is a man-child heart, a woman-child heart: it is a father and mother and lover: it came from God-Knows-Where: it is going to God-Knows-Where—For I am the keeper of the zoo: I say yes and no: I sing and kill and work: I am a pal of the world: I came from the wilderness.

[spike]

Health wise, I was doing really good up until about age 44-1/2, and then, a bunch of little shit piled up like rosacea on my face, a stye on my eyelid that lasted three months only followed by popping a blood vessel in my other eye, which was harmless but left me with a red eye for another month or so.

Eye caramba

Yeah, all from the rosacea. I have something called ocular rosacea, so it affects my skin and eyes. Fun times but I have it more under control now.

Eye Vey

Stye Go

Hemorr Christ

[96583UP]

i think it was this past summer when i went on a Nirvana kick and spent hundreds of bucks buying some of kirk cobains guitar pedals

but still plenty of time for weirder things

[Bammer]

Ditto. Feels like it won’t hit me until a parent dies then it’ll be full steam ahead.

Interesting. At 42 I am squarely at midlife. And my mom died over 10 years ago.

[96583UP]

sorry to hear that, friend

[tragabigzanda]

There is a wolf in me . . . fangs pointed for tearing gashes . . . a red tongue for raw meat . . . and the hot lapping of blood—I keep this wolf because the wilderness gave it to me and the wilderness will not let it go.

There is a fox in me . . . a silver-gray fox . . . I sniff and guess . . . I pick things out of the wind and air . . . I nose in the dark night and take sleepers and eat them and hide the feathers . . . I circle and loop and double-cross.

There is a hog in me . . . a snout and a belly . . . a machinery for eating and grunting . . . a machinery for sleeping satisfied in the sun—I got this too from the wilderness and the wilderness will not let it go.

There is a fish in me . . . I know I came from salt-blue water-gates . . . I scurried with shoals of herring . . . I blew waterspouts with porpoises . . . before land was . . . before the water went down . . . before Noah . . . before the first chapter of Genesis.

There is a baboon in me . . . clambering-clawed . . . dog-faced . . . yawping a galoot's hunger . . . hairy under the armpits . . . here are the hawk-eyed hankering men . . . here are the blonde and blue-eyed women . . . here they hide curled asleep waiting . . . ready to snarl and kill . . . ready to sing and give milk . . . waiting—I keep the baboon because the wilderness says so.

There is an eagle in me and a mockingbird . . . and the eagle flies among the Rocky Mountains of my dreams and fights among the Sierra crags of what I want . . . and the mockingbird warbles in the early forenoon before the dew is gone, warbles in the underbrush of my Chattanoogas of hope, gushes over the blue Ozark foothills of my wishes—And I got the eagle and the mockingbird from the wilderness.

O, I got a zoo, I got a menagerie, inside my ribs, under my bony head, under my red-valve heart—and I got something else: it is a man-child heart, a woman-child heart: it is a father and mother and lover: it came from God-Knows-Where: it is going to God-Knows-Where—For I am the keeper of the zoo: I say yes and no: I sing and kill and work: I am a pal of the world: I came from the wilderness.

[Jorge]

Mid life officially starts at 45