Next Drumoise

General Pearl Jam discussion.
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spike
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Re: Next Drumoise

Post by spike »

96583UP wrote: Tue September 15, 2026 1:45 pm I think at this point the issue is less his style and stamina and more that Ed’s rein is total, absolute, supreme, and shall remain unchallenged; and any new drummer must accept that they are human only in flesh, exist as a vessel through which they will solely execute instruction, acknowledge that their views are irrelevant and inferior unless they relate specifically toward supporting and congratulating Ed’s actions; and will not be permitted to engage in any independent thought or action while in the service of Pearl Jam LLC; and accordingly the pool of available candidates will be comprised solely of drumming consultants pre-screened by E&Y, disposable, and exchangeable at the discretion of the LLC at any point in time.
Feels like the hire will definitely be more Kilnghoffer side player than actual band member. Ed may add some extra toms just to completely obscure the drummer’s visage during performances. Mostly so he doesn’t have to look at him.
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Re: Next Drumoise

Post by tree_ »

Farmer John wrote: Tue September 15, 2026 8:23 pm I always thought people said "go listen to Candlebox" the same way they would say "get lost" or "get bent". Not to be taken literally.
Lol
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96583UP
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Re: Next Drumoise

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spike wrote: Tue September 15, 2026 10:49 pm
96583UP wrote: Tue September 15, 2026 1:45 pm I think at this point the issue is less his style and stamina and more that Ed’s rein is total, absolute, supreme, and shall remain unchallenged; and any new drummer must accept that they are human only in flesh, exist as a vessel through which they will solely execute instruction, acknowledge that their views are irrelevant and inferior unless they relate specifically toward supporting and congratulating Ed’s actions; and will not be permitted to engage in any independent thought or action while in the service of Pearl Jam LLC; and accordingly the pool of available candidates will be comprised solely of drumming consultants pre-screened by E&Y, disposable, and exchangeable at the discretion of the LLC at any point in time.
Feels like the hire will definitely be more Kilnghoffer side player than actual band member. Ed may add some extra toms just to completely obscure the drummer’s visage during performances. Mostly so he doesn’t have to look at him.
Good point. They might even make the drummer go through one of those 8-hour professional hollywood makeup/putty sessions to conceal their identity and convert the face into one that is familiar, and comforting to Ed, like his personal shopper or Boom. Another Boom would send a signal to Pearl Jan fans to look no further and cease any follow-up questions, because they already know to assign no value to that person.
All posts by this account, even those referencing real things, are entirely fictional and are for entertainment purposes only; i.e. very low-quality entertainment. These may contain coarse language and due to their content should not be viewed by anyone
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spike
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Re: Next Drumoise

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96583UP wrote: Tue September 15, 2026 11:02 pm
spike wrote: Tue September 15, 2026 10:49 pm
96583UP wrote: Tue September 15, 2026 1:45 pm I think at this point the issue is less his style and stamina and more that Ed’s rein is total, absolute, supreme, and shall remain unchallenged; and any new drummer must accept that they are human only in flesh, exist as a vessel through which they will solely execute instruction, acknowledge that their views are irrelevant and inferior unless they relate specifically toward supporting and congratulating Ed’s actions; and will not be permitted to engage in any independent thought or action while in the service of Pearl Jam LLC; and accordingly the pool of available candidates will be comprised solely of drumming consultants pre-screened by E&Y, disposable, and exchangeable at the discretion of the LLC at any point in time.
Feels like the hire will definitely be more Kilnghoffer side player than actual band member. Ed may add some extra toms just to completely obscure the drummer’s visage during performances. Mostly so he doesn’t have to look at him.
Good point. They might even make the drummer go through one of those 8-hour professional hollywood makeup/putty sessions to conceal their identity and convert the face into one that is familiar, and comforting to Ed, like his personal shopper or Boom. Another Boom would send a signal to Pearl Jan fans to look no further and cease any follow-up questions, because they already know to assign no value to that person.
With that level creative team, why stop at human form? They could make the drummer look like a Corona bottle or vintage typewriter, despite such inanimate objects having more value than Boom.
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tragabigzanda
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Re: Next Drumoise

Post by tragabigzanda »

we're getting dangerously close to Angine de Poitrine territory here and TBH it's the best thing that could happen for them
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Farmer John
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Re: Next Drumoise

Post by Farmer John »

96583UP wrote: Tue September 15, 2026 11:02 pm
spike wrote: Tue September 15, 2026 10:49 pm
96583UP wrote: Tue September 15, 2026 1:45 pm I think at this point the issue is less his style and stamina and more that Ed’s rein is total, absolute, supreme, and shall remain unchallenged; and any new drummer must accept that they are human only in flesh, exist as a vessel through which they will solely execute instruction, acknowledge that their views are irrelevant and inferior unless they relate specifically toward supporting and congratulating Ed’s actions; and will not be permitted to engage in any independent thought or action while in the service of Pearl Jam LLC; and accordingly the pool of available candidates will be comprised solely of drumming consultants pre-screened by E&Y, disposable, and exchangeable at the discretion of the LLC at any point in time.
Feels like the hire will definitely be more Kilnghoffer side player than actual band member. Ed may add some extra toms just to completely obscure the drummer’s visage during performances. Mostly so he doesn’t have to look at him.
Good point. They might even make the drummer go through one of those 8-hour professional hollywood makeup/putty sessions to conceal their identity and convert the face into one that is familiar, and comforting to Ed, like his personal shopper or Boom. Another Boom would send a signal to Pearl Jan fans to look no further and cease any follow-up questions, because they already know to assign no value to that person.
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Re: Next Drumoise

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:haha:
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Re: Next Drumoise

Post by Clem Halibut »

tree_ wrote: Tue September 15, 2026 10:51 pm
Farmer John wrote: Tue September 15, 2026 8:23 pm I always thought people said "go listen to Candlebox" the same way they would say "get lost" or "get bent". Not to be taken literally.
Lol
LOL Candlebox
Basically a Grunge exit ramp for the people who now find themselves listening to Modern Country Music
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Re: Next Drumoise

Post by Aunt_Claire_Foy »

Clem Halibut wrote: Wed September 16, 2026 2:46 pm
tree_ wrote: Tue September 15, 2026 10:51 pm
Farmer John wrote: Tue September 15, 2026 8:23 pm I always thought people said "go listen to Candlebox" the same way they would say "get lost" or "get bent". Not to be taken literally.
Lol
LOL Candlebox
Basically a Grunge exit ramp for the people who now find themselves listening to Modern Country Music
...and Dave Krusen's second band. But yes it can also mean "fuck off".
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Re: Next Drumoise

Post by tree_ »

what about Collective Soul?
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Re: Next Drumoise

Post by Chris_H_2 »

Clem Halibut wrote: Wed September 16, 2026 2:46 pm
tree_ wrote: Tue September 15, 2026 10:51 pm
Farmer John wrote: Tue September 15, 2026 8:23 pm I always thought people said "go listen to Candlebox" the same way they would say "get lost" or "get bent". Not to be taken literally.
Lol
LOL Candlebox
Basically a Grunge exit ramp for the people who now find themselves listening to Modern Country Music
somewhere. off in the distance. bammer is offended.
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Re: Next Drumoise

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Farmer John wrote: Tue September 15, 2026 8:23 pm I always thought people said "go listen to Candlebox" the same way they would say "get lost" or "get bent". Not to be taken literally.
I never know what to do with Candlebox. I'm not ashamed to say I like a lot of the first three albums. The original guitar player Peter Klett did some pretty cool stuff on those. Some of that is tinted by nostalgia I'm sure? Kevin Martin's lyrics are mostly stupid/nonsensical but he has a good voice. He also seems like an obnoxious poseur who makes shit up? Except the band is from Seattle so they aren't exactly poseurs? Yet they weren't really part of the scene that we all know about so maybe they are? Although it's a fact they are more connected to Seattle than Eddie ever was early on so what does that mean? Haha. You can understand my dilemma. :haha:
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Re: Next Drumoise

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I dont think i ever listened to Candlebox.
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Re: Next Drumoise

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what about Collective Soul?
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Re: Next Drumoise

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i like maybe 5 songs yeah
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Re: Next Drumoise

Post by tree_ »

oh ok thanks... why don't you go listen to them?
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Re: Next Drumoise

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Collective Soul did not age well
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Re: Next Drumoise

Post by Farmer John »

darthvedder81 wrote: Wed September 16, 2026 7:02 pm
Farmer John wrote: Tue September 15, 2026 8:23 pm I always thought people said "go listen to Candlebox" the same way they would say "get lost" or "get bent". Not to be taken literally.
I never know what to do with Candlebox. I'm not ashamed to say I like a lot of the first three albums. The original guitar player Peter Klett did some pretty cool stuff on those. Some of that is tinted by nostalgia I'm sure? Kevin Martin's lyrics are mostly stupid/nonsensical but he has a good voice. He also seems like an obnoxious poseur who makes shit up? Except the band is from Seattle so they aren't exactly poseurs? Yet they weren't really part of the scene that we all know about so maybe they are? Although it's a fact they are more connected to Seattle than Eddie ever was early on so what does that mean? Haha. You can understand my dilemma. :haha:
Apparently he recorded his own audition demo tape for pearl jam?

https://youtube.com/shorts/al0-dkc2nWA? ... rqM-o7HFae
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Re: Next Drumoise

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tree_ wrote: Wed September 16, 2026 7:47 pm oh ok thanks... why don't you go listen to them?
Whoa, take it easy!
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spike
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Re: Next Drumoise

Post by spike »

I knew Candlebox sucked back in high school.
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