Era of the moment: 1997-1998

[Lament]

Don't you have a goatee, stip?

[stip]

I'm an atheist and I sure as hell don't want my foreskin back.

me neither. that shit looks weird.

[Norah]

Seriously, it's fucking gross.

[stip]

Don't you have a goatee, stip?

I do. I had a full beard for a while but I accidentally shaved part of it off in the bleary first month of kid 2, and then I kept it off because my wife prefers just the goatee. I'm hoping this encourages her to dye her hair red or cut hers shorter, but so far no luck

[Lament]

I know a lot of girls who won't sleep with a guy if he's not circumcised. So I'm pretty grateful that I am.

Man, this is the second Pearl Jam thread to turn into a circumcision discussion in the past few months.

[Lament]

Don't you have a goatee, stip?

I do. I had a full beard for a while but I accidentally shaved part of it off in the bleary first month of kid 2, and then I kept it off because my wife prefers just the goatee. I'm hoping this encourages her to dye her hair red or cut hers shorter, but so far no luck

Ahh, ok. So it was unintentional and now you're using it for leverage? I can get behind that. I was worried you were gonna say "Yes. Goatees are awesome."

[Jorge]

I am a former member. I am hoping Platy can recommend a doctor to reattach my foreskin.

You know you can actually literally grow it out, right? The human body is amazing.

[Lament]

All this talk of bucket hats and goatees had me wondering what my biggest fashion/style mistakes in my lifetime were. And then the whole discussion came full circle when I realized the answer was "Those however many minutes I had a foreskin for when I was at the hospital."

[Norah]

The most egregious of style blunders, for sure.

[Lament]

Worse than wearing a bucket hat and sporting a goatee simultaneously.

[Norah]

Easily.

[Lament]

If Jorge put on a bucket hat, he could shatter the space-time continuum.

[Norah]

The entire universe would collapse in on itself. We'd be back to the singularity. I think he should do it.

[Jorge]

What the hell is wrong with you two?

[Lament]

If for no other reason than to stop Ed before he goes any further. Or to end the fight in the mosquito bites thread.

[Norah]

What the hell is wrong with you two?

There's literally nothing else to do.

[Lament]

What the hell is wrong with you two?

How much time do you have?

[Norah]

If for no other reason than to stop Ed before he goes any further. Or to end the fight in the mosquito bites thread.

What will rise from the ashes of this current existence?

[Jorge]

I'd like a formal apology from both of you for assaulting my dick for absolutely no reason.

[Lament]

A universe run by a race of master platypuses, I would assume.