I went in with no expectations of a great story, justice paid to the book, or a groundbreaking idea. I was just there for the ride... the wrap-up of Peter Jackson's baby, which has kept me entertained for the better part of the last decade +...
It was a joke. A parody of itself. Some parts (*many) left me feeling like I was watching The Hobbit - Men In Tights, or The Naked Gun: The LOTR Prequel. Especially the Legolas scenes. Whether it be riding a horse, shooting an arrow, or running awkwardly UPHILL on falling debris in the sky... the Legolas scenes were so BAD... Bad acting, bad CGI, and bad ideas! I thought the battle scene btwn Thorin and that big badass Orc was also stupid, and extremely predictable. Floating beneath the ice like that was ridiculous, and the scenes just seemed hastily thrown together with not much attention to detail, as opposed to the LOTR trilogy, especially the first two. Squeezing three long movies out of this one book made for some horrendous vamping throughout the trilogy. Unlike LOTR, where they couldn't fit enough of the story into the three movies, the Hobbit trilogy left us with very little plot in the end, cheesy interactions between most of the characters, and lame attempts at humor. levity, or whatever the fuck!
I was, however, happy near the end when Gandalf and Bilbo shared a moment... when the Gray wizard was cleaning his pipe. It was lighthearted after a fierce time together, and left me with a sort of understanding that he knows the Hobbit found the ring, but we shouldn't discuss it. Later, as Bilbo returned to the Shire, my heart got all warm and fuzzy again, and I thought it segued nicely enough that it made me want to go watch The Fellowship...
I doubt very seriously that I'll ever watch any of this Hobbit trilogy ever again, but I'll always have the book if I ever want to return to the Lonely Mountain...
...and Good God, what a hottie!
