Star Wars: Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)

[Norah]

lol

[epilogue]

Ruddo, just make everyone's avatar a picture of JJ Abrams.

[BurtReynolds]

Insufferable

[epilogue]

Burt is an asset.

[spike]

burt is great, just not in star wars threads

[BurtReynolds]

this is why LV left/David Bowie died.

[dimejinky99]

Did LV leave??

Fuck off.

Did he??

[Strat]

Did LV leave??

Fuck off.

Did he??

The new batman v superman trailer did him in.

[dimejinky99]

Did LV leave??

Fuck off.

Did he??

The new batman v superman trailer did him in.

Did love that bit in that new teaser. Batty getting pissy cos the batmobile bouncing off supes legs and not even bothering him


And then 'you will bleed'


Piss off ye pussy

[epilogue]

Guys, he hasn't posted on Facebook in three days either....

[BurtReynolds]

He's strictly into vaporwave now.

[@SkitchP]

Guys, he hasn't posted on Facebook in three days either....

We need Nicholas to rescue him from this abyss.

[epilogue]

Guys, he hasn't posted on Facebook in three days either....

We need Nicholas to rescue him from this abyss.

WHO IS NICHOLAS

[@SkitchP]

Guys, he hasn't posted on Facebook in three days either....

We need Nicholas to rescue him from this abyss.

WHO IS NICHOLAS

So I said the last part in jest, but this turned out to be a frighteningly real possibility.

First off, the trail is unbelievable. The most gorgeous views I've ever seen. And my wife and I prepared for the length and strenuousness - we packed lots of food and water, and took breaks regularly.

What we did not realize we needed to prepare for was the sun. The heat.

With about two or three miles left to hike, I started having serious problems. I practically collapsed at one point, but resting wasn't helping. Water wasn't helping. Food wasn't helping. Then my hands went numb. All ten of my fingers hardened into straight lines and I couldn't move them. My wife didn't know how to help me. Then, a stranger came up behind us and asked if we were okay - a French man named Nicholas. In a stroke of incredible luck, he seemed to know exactly what to do. First he gave me his hat, which instantly helped. He told me that I had to keep moving; stopping was the worst thing we could do because the sun would not stop (due to a recent fire, there was no shade at this point on the hike). He made me take my shirt off, gave me some water, and carried my backpack for me.

I was experiencing heatstroke.

We kept going, and it's difficult to describe how I felt. I kept thinking about that hiker who had recently died of heatstroke while hiking in a national park. I had realized at that point that death was a very real possibility. It felt like my body was shutting down. My calves were on fire and my knees could barely move. The sun just kept beating mercilessly.

Then it got even worse - my wife also began experiencing heatstroke. She was already crying and terrified for me, and then she began to feel like she couldn't continue. At that point, I had to start using one hand to steady her and push her forward, because she kept trying to stop, saying things like "I'm done." and "I can't go any further." I knew that if either of us stopped, there was a high probability we were not going to get up again. "I'm done." meant "I'm done." So we just kept pushing forward, and every step was agony. We had probably half a mile to a mile left to go at that point. Every time we turned a corner and didn't see the end of the trail, it felt hopeless and overwhelming. My wife began getting dizzy and unstable, which was very bad because there were steep drop-offs along the trail. I felt like I had no strength, but I still had to stop her from falling.

Nicholas stayed with us the whole time, trying to calm us down by talking to us, asking us questions, telling us what to do. I just kept saying things to my wife like "We're almost there," "We're so close," "We've come so far," and "You can do it." By the end, I was pretty much yelling them to her. She was so close to giving up, but I knew what would mean.

Then we rounded a corner and saw a parking lot in the distance. It was the end of the trail. But even better, there was an alpine waterfall which fed into a small pond on the way. My wife and I pushed our way toward it, then both of us jumped in. We just bathed ourselves in it for minutes and then heatstroke faded away. Our faculties returned. It was one of the best moments of my life. We both started weeping. Nicholas went to the parking lot to retrieve my brother, who had water. When he came back, he shook our hands. Choking back tears, I told him he saved our lives. He said, "No, it's just big emotion." I can't even think about him without starting to cry now. He did everything right.

Not realizing they were in my pockets, I ruined both of our iPhones when I jumped in the pond. But it's amazing how stupid most things you care about seem when you are facing death. I'm just so relieved to be alive right now. I'm so relieved that my wife is alive. I'm so relieved they we are relaxing in an air-conditioned house. My legs feel like rocks and my feet are covered in blisters, but I feel goddamn fantastic. Nature beat me yesterday. It was terrifying, overwhelming, incredible. But I'm still here.

[epilogue]

I...

[dimejinky99]

Who ate who in the end

[@SkitchP]

Who ate who in the end

Sebulba

[dimejinky99]

Bantha poodoo

[E.H. Ruddock]

I'm so into everything skitch it's sickening

[dimejinky99]

Aren't we all?

Does he have an RM poster of the year nom yet?