Homer the Vigilante
A number of burglaries by a cat burglar take place in Springfield, even striking the Simpsons' house. Among the stolen items include Lisa's saxophone, Marge's pearl necklace, Bart's stamp collection, and the handheld television. In response, the residents of Springfield arm themselves and install security devices. A neighborhood watch group is formed, and the members elect Homer as their leader. The group patrols the streets, but its members only end up violating laws further than catching criminals, turning into vigilantes. When Homer is interviewed on news anchor Kent Brockman's Smartline, the cat burglar calls the show and informs Homer that he will steal the world's largest cubic zirconia from the Springfield museum.
Homer and his group begin guarding the museum. Grampa and his friends from the retirement home volunteer to help, but Homer tells them to leave because they are too old. A few minutes later, Homer sees a group of teenagers drinking beer. He leaves his post to intervene and catch them, but immediately ends up getting drunk with them instead. While Homer's guard is down, the cat burglar sneaks past and steals the zirconia. Homer is blamed and pelted with vegetables by the unforgiving townspeople. Later that day, Grampa stops by the Simpsons' house and tells everybody that he knows who the cat burglar is: a resident in the local retirement home named Molloy.
Homer captures Molloy at the retirement home, and the surprisingly amiable cat burglar returns the objects he stole. Chief Wiggum arrests him and he is imprisoned. While in his cell at the police station, Molloy casually mentions that he assumes Homer and the cops probably want to know where he hid all of his loot. This piques their interest, and Molloy tells them the stash is hidden under a giant "T" somewhere in Springfield. They all rush out of the station hoping to get the treasure for themselves. In a matter of minutes the entire town hears of the existence of Molloy's stash and almost everybody in Springfield is racing to get there first. After the residents get to the site and dig, they finally discover a box with a note inside. The note tells them that there is no treasure and that while they have been searching, Molloy has escaped from his cell. However, several citizens continue to dig, convinced that a real treasure must be buried deeper.
Grampa vs. Sexual Inadequacy
When Homer and Marge's marriage declines due to their fading sex life, Abe pieces together a medication|tonic that is guaranteed to put the sparks back into their relationship. The effectiveness of the tonic results in Homer and Abe going into business together, selling "Simpson and Son’s Revitalizing Tonic" to the public utilizing a medicine show. They travel from town to town selling the product, but after visiting the farmhouse where Homer grew up, the two get into an argument. Abe yells at Homer in the car, saying that if he had not taken the tonic years ago, Homer would not have been born, finally shouting "You were an accident!" Homer stops the car and hisses "Get out!", not accepting Abe's apology and saying in an "OUT". Abe steps out of the car and says he hopes Homer will forgive him, but Homer drives away and leaves his father there, later telling Marge he cannot forgive what his father said and then resolves to be a better father. However, things don't go well for either Homer or Abe: Homer's rushed efforts to bond with Bart and Lisa lead them to note that he's just as "half-assed" at doing too much as he was at being a non-presence for them, while Abe's attempt to use Barney as the new "Son" fails instantly.
Bart attempts to figure out why all of the adults disappear after they buy the "Simpson and Son's Tonic". They come up with a few conspiracy theories, all of which are unrelated with the tonic. Lisa, however, sarcastically offers up the possibility of all the adults having to be home before dark due to being reverse vampires, which frightens the rest of the children more than their other ideas.
Depressed at having failed to be a good father even when he is trying, Homer goes back to the farmhouse to think. He sees old photographs, including one of himself as a child on Christmas morning, where he thinks his father was not even there on Christmas when he finally got to meet Santa Claus. Homer then realizes that it was really his father in a Santa costume, proving that Abe did actually care for him. Homer quickly reunites with Abe, who by coincidence has also gone to the farmhouse to reflect. Both of them accidentally set fire to different parts of the building, starting with Homer accidentally setting fire to the photo and Abe throwing a bottle of his tonic into a fireplace, and bump into one another on the front porch while fleeing the blaze. They both admit they are screw-ups and they finally reconcile.
Homer the Vigilante vs. Granmpa vs. Sexual Inadequacy
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Homer the Vigilante vs. Granmpa vs. Sexual Inadequacy
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Re: Homer the Vigilante vs. Granmpa vs. Sexual Inadequacy
I forgot about Homer the Vigilante. That's a tremendous episode.
Chief Wiggum: "NO, no, Dig UP Stupid!"
Kent Brockman: "Mr. Simpson, how do you respond to the charge that petty vandalism such as graffiti is down 80%, while heavy sack beatings are up a shocking 900%."
Homer: "Oh people can come up with statistics to prove anything Kent. Forfty percent of all people know that."
Kent Brockman: "I see. Well, what do you say to the accusation that your group has been causing more crimes than it's been preventing?"
Homer: "Oh, Kent, I'd be lying if I said my men weren't committing crimes."
Kent Brockman: "Well, touché."
Homer Simpson: "Never ever stop in the middle of a hoe-down"
Chief Wiggum: What do you think of this, boys?
Eddie: Well, it doesn't look like anything, but if you move these two here, and this one here...
Chief Wiggum: It almost looks like an arrow.
Lou: And it's pointing right at this police station.
Chief Wiggum: Let's get out of here!
Chief Wiggum: "NO, no, Dig UP Stupid!"
Kent Brockman: "Mr. Simpson, how do you respond to the charge that petty vandalism such as graffiti is down 80%, while heavy sack beatings are up a shocking 900%."
Homer: "Oh people can come up with statistics to prove anything Kent. Forfty percent of all people know that."
Kent Brockman: "I see. Well, what do you say to the accusation that your group has been causing more crimes than it's been preventing?"
Homer: "Oh, Kent, I'd be lying if I said my men weren't committing crimes."
Kent Brockman: "Well, touché."
Homer Simpson: "Never ever stop in the middle of a hoe-down"
Chief Wiggum: What do you think of this, boys?
Eddie: Well, it doesn't look like anything, but if you move these two here, and this one here...
Chief Wiggum: It almost looks like an arrow.
Lou: And it's pointing right at this police station.
Chief Wiggum: Let's get out of here!
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Re: Homer the Vigilante vs. Granmpa vs. Sexual Inadequacy
Sexual Inadequacy, hands down.
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Re: Homer the Vigilante vs. Granmpa vs. Sexual Inadequacy
Dig up, stupid, is one of my go to quotes.
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Re: Homer the Vigilante vs. Granmpa vs. Sexual Inadequacy
I'm actually not a big fan of either of these episodes, something that hasn't happened in any match-up I've seen so far. The tribute to It's A Mad, Mad... is memorable, so I'll vote for HTV.
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Re: Homer the Vigilante vs. Granmpa vs. Sexual Inadequacy
LoathedVermin72 wrote:Sexual Inadequacy, hands down.
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Re: Homer the Vigilante vs. Granmpa vs. Sexual Inadequacy
what were some of the better bits from sexual inadequacy besides the reverse vampires?
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Re: Homer the Vigilante vs. Granmpa vs. Sexual Inadequacy
I think the father/son stuff feels really genuine and touching.