Song of the Moment: Mind Your Manners

[stip]

This is a very enjoyable song

[harmless]

I'm pretty sure I'm more than one step away from that, dime. Because that's fucked up, and I'm only joking.

[stip]

Actually, I never thought that 'play come back because my wife died' request was weird at all.

[dimejinky99]

Aw c'mon stip.
Think about it though.
Your wife dies.
You go public asking for a (really sad)song.
Night of the gig the band play it.
You're gonna bawl your eyes out. Sorta ruining it for yourself and possibly whoevers with you and around you.

Just a strange thing to ask for but grief does strange things I guess.

[dimejinky99]

I was just kiddin mark

[harmless]

Aw c'mon stip.
Think about it though.
Your wife dies.
You go public asking for a (really sad)song.
Night of the gig the band play it.
You're gonna bawl your eyes out. Sorta ruining it for yourself and possibly whoevers with you and around you.

Just a strange thing to ask for but grief does strange things I guess.

While I agree with you, I think that anyone whose night is ruined because a guy in the audience is crying is probably dead inside

[McParadigm]

Actually, I never thought that 'play come back because my wife died' request was weird at all.

When that first popped up, I thought it was a pretty odd way to try and deal. I couldn't really say how or why, but it just seemed...off, somehow.

Now, with my dad passing a few weeks ago, I have a different perspective.

I sat down and tried to imagine myself going on to the official board and typing out a message that said, you know, my father and I were very close, and he passed recently, and he wasn't really all that old so it's a bit of a shock and huge personal loss. We shared a love of music, and really bonded a lot through that over the years...could the band please play Release at such-and-such concert, so I could think about him and sort of say goodbye in that way?

And that's when I realized....

...yeah, that really seems like an odd way to try and deal.

I can understand why someone else might see sense in it, I suppose. And we tend to forgive a lot when someone is suffering the loss of a loved one, with good reason. But it's still weird to me.

[E.H. Ruddock]

I was going to post that same request last week if my kid's cat didn't come home.

[EJ]

When I've bad temporary bouts of constipation I've been tempted to post a request on synergy for the band to play Crapshoot Rapture.

[Walker Bait]

When I've bad temporary bouts of constipation I've been tempted to post a request on synergy for the band to play Crapshoot Rapture.

[Walker Bait]

I've decided the song is awesome. I enjoy blasting it as loud as I can in my car without blowing the speakers while driving and singing along. There's so much energy, much more energy in the song than anything they've written in a while.

[Birds in Hell]

I can understand why someone else might see sense in it, I suppose. And we tend to forgive a lot when someone is suffering the loss of a loved one, with good reason. But it's still weird to me.

Me too.

It wasn't necessarily the sentiment itself - I understand why someone might want to hear a certain song if it reminds them of that person or to help cope with feelings of grief - it was the way in which it was done (so publicly, so incredibly soon after the events) that sat uneasily with me. Even the title of the thread: "I lost my wife a week ago (play Come Back at Wrigley)"

Just awful, everything.

[vedder316]

This came on last night on the local radio station around 11pm as Iwas pulling in my driveway. I sat and listened to it again despite playing it every day on my iPhone. I thinks it's a top 50 song for me now and still climbing. Really digging it.

[lvc]

pitchfork is to this review as pearl jam is to creed

I think that with the release of Just Breathe that Pearl Jam fans lost all moral high ground to make that type comparison to Creed.

pitchfork is to this review as pearl jam is to creed as Arms Wide Open is to Just Breathe.

Just Breathe isn't perfect but it's better than anything Creed ever wrote and is nothing like Creed.

Compare the two songs. I'd venture to say that Arms Wide Open is the much song in fact. Just Breathe is the epitomy of Mom&Dad rock.

Dad rock is a stupid fucking phrase and just breathe is a lovely song

Said the dad...

doesn't anything I like technically become dad rock?

An important part of being a father is training your kid(s) in how to navigate the world. So if Dad Rock is something you can use to teach your kid(s) what qualities to listen for when they begin to explore the musical universe, thereby equipping them to find music that resonates with them, the Dad Rock is ok with me.

[stip]

I can understand why someone else might see sense in it, I suppose. And we tend to forgive a lot when someone is suffering the loss of a loved one, with good reason. But it's still weird to me.

Me too.

It wasn't necessarily the sentiment itself - I understand why someone might want to hear a certain song if it reminds them of that person or to help cope with feelings of grief - it was the way in which it was done (so publicly, so incredibly soon after the events) that sat uneasily with me. Even the title of the thread: "I lost my wife a week ago (play Come Back at Wrigley)"

Just awful, everything.

With the possible enormous caveat that I never read that thread, it is very easy for me to imagine a particular song being particularly cathartic. There have been songs I have identified with painful break ups, for instance. If I was going to be seeing that band in the near future it might mean a lot to me to hear it. It could help me deal with the grief, etc. i would hope that they would play it. And it is not a huge leap to get from that to making the request, out of hopes that word might filter back to the family, or even just as a way to elicit needed sympathy.

And on that topical clusterfuck of a message board titleing it the way that the guy did was probably necessary to make sure it did not immediately disappear.


I am not saying I would have done that. But the seemingly universal contempt for this move is surprising to me

[surfndestroy]

I am not saying I would have done that. But the seemingly universal 'hatred' for this move is surprising to me

I don't get the big deal. The person's in mourning and thinks this song will help them in some way. I'm sure if he had Ed's email address he would have sent a private message. But failing that, he reached out the only way he could think of. I wish the guy luck and hope he gets his song, cries his eyes out and feels a moment of happiness or peace.

[Farmer John]

Has anyone actually heard it on a regular radio station? I haven't. Of course, there are no radio stations in the metro NYC area that would even give this one the light of day.

I've heard it on the radio quite a bit.

[Thejambi]

I can understand why someone else might see sense in it, I suppose. And we tend to forgive a lot when someone is suffering the loss of a loved one, with good reason. But it's still weird to me.

Me too.

It wasn't necessarily the sentiment itself - I understand why someone might want to hear a certain song if it reminds them of that person or to help cope with feelings of grief - it was the way in which it was done (so publicly, so incredibly soon after the events) that sat uneasily with me. Even the title of the thread: "I lost my wife a week ago (play Come Back at Wrigley)"

Just awful, everything.

With the possible enormous caveat that I never read that thread, it is very easy for me to imagine a particular song being particularly cathartic. There have been songs I have identified with painful break ups, for instance. If I was going to be seeing that band in the near future it might mean a lot to me to hear it. It could help me deal with the grief, etc. i would hope that they would play it. And it is not a huge leap to get from that to making the request, out of hopes that word might filter back to the family, or even just as a way to elicit needed sympathy.

And on that topical clusterfuck of a message board titleing it the way that the guy did was probably necessary to make sure it did not immediately disappear.


I am not saying I would have done that. But the seemingly universal contempt for this move is surprising to me

Thinking about Pearl Jam concert a week after your wife dies just seems odd to me. I know everyone mourns and deals with death differently so it's not my place to deem whats appropriate or not.

Based on his post i think a better tribute would be to work with the 10c to possibly auction the tickets off to the National Kidney Foundation.

[McParadigm]

Thinking about Pearl Jam concert a week after your wife dies just seems odd to me. I know everyone mourns and deals with death differently so it's not my place to deem whats appropriate or not.

Based on his post i think a better tribute would be to work with the 10c to possibly auction the tickets off to the National Kidney Foundation.

Yeah, like I said, I can understand why someone would appreciate or empathize with his plight. What makes it hard for ME to get is basically this: if that song was important or special to you/her, you've got it....forever. If going to see PJ shows was your special thing, well...you're going to one. You know?

Now, my dad and I shared a love of Neil Young (I've even got a recording somewhere of us dueting on Four Strong Winds), but if he and I had planned to go to a Neil Young concert before he passed, I wouldn't even register the IDEA of trying to get that or any other song played at the show. I might not be registering the idea of the concert at ALL, for a couple of weeks. But honestly, if I did think about it...I doubt if I'd even still be going. I'd probably treat it the way you would if someone got too ill to attend. "Okay, this was supposed to be you and me...so if you can't be there, then I guess we'll sit it out." That's just the way I would feel.

To each their own, and all that, but "hey shit I'll go to that concert anyway and ask them to play that song for me" is right up there with "I'm gonna get a tattoo of my own last name" on the You Don't Make Any Sense to Me meter.

[dimejinky99]

Four strong winds. One of his underrated greats.