Red Mosquito

Koji Uehara

I put together some Dream Teams real quick with staffs of just one starter and the rest relievers, and teams of all-starters.

You can't start a reliever under any circumstance. They won't show up as an option. On the all-starters team, they only give six of them as an option to start. The only thing is it seems to be random which six they'll let you start at any time. The rest of them they simulator will use for bullpen duty. So if you have five starters, it's unlikely that the simulator will use one in the bullpen. If you have six or more though, they will.

Makes sense. We all have wonderful rotations so I could see a lot of 5-4, 4-3 games. That being said who the fuck knows.

When teams roll into my ballpark, we're gonna have some 11-7 and 14-5 games.

TOUCHDOWN!

You walk into Coors Field. You look at your opponent's lineup...

1. 2012 Mike Trout (.326, 30 HR)
2. 2012 Buster Posey (.336, 24 HR)
3. 1997 Frank Thomas (.349, 40 HR)
4. 2010 Josh Hamilton (.359 32 HR)
5. 2004 Adrian Beltre (.334, 48 HR)
6. 2004 Miguel Tejada (.311, 34 HR)
7. 2000 Jeff Kent (.334, 33 HR)
8. 2011 Jose Bautista (.302, 43 HR)

But then you realize your lineup is just as stacked. Then lots of home runs are hit.

Batista hitting 8th.

Our lineups will look like all star teams for sure.

Anyone else see the irony of Hamilton's home ballpark? Bad joke I know.

I'm betting he hits better when he's buzzed.

Also, I will have a team of attractive women shooting up Tejada in the on-deck circle before each at bat.

And Jeff Kent will get dropped off at second base in a pick-up truck at the start of each inning.

Instead of the seventh inning stretch, Barry Zito will play a tender ballad on guitar for everyone.

Lament wrote:Instead of the seventh inning stretch, Barry Zito will play a tender ballad on guitar for everyone.

Barry Zito and Bronson Arroyo should start a band.

Jose Lima on vocals.

numbers wrote:Jose Lima on vocals.

Debut could have been Lima Time. Missed opportunity.

Y'know, as of 9:06, chud has been able to pick.

Joe Nathan

Joakim Soria.

Carl Crawford

Just before the deadline. 4/5 is on the clock and will be skipped if he doesn't make a pick by 11:56 eastern time, and then the clock is off for the night.

I would imagine if 4/5 doesn't pick before then, Skitch probably won't be around to either. But if this is it for the night, we did pretty well in terms of getting a lot of picks knocked out over a holiday weekend. We did much better than the song tournaments do, at least.