Fat Acceptance

[lennytheweedwhacker]

I’m not sure I’ve heard that term

Do you use Tumblr?

is that some kind of lube?

[Ello Sailor]

This is about health, not appearance.

you guys should pick one, might go somewhere.

Who's "you guys"? I speak for myself.

You and Verb

I wasn't addressing you.

[JuanHamm]

This is about health, not appearance.

you guys should pick one, might go somewhere.

Who's "you guys"? I speak for myself.

You and Verb

I wasn't addressing you.

Spike and I speak with one voice

[lennytheweedwhacker]

Soma's outlook is very common, but it is reductive, unhelpful, and fundamentally wrong, tantamount to telling a person with depression "just cheer up" or an alcoholic "have you considered having just one beer?". For many it's a mental health struggle, linked to mood disorders and compulsive behaviors. These are things that aren't "easy" to break out of. There's a wealth of research on this subject (not to mention a multi-billion dollar industry capitalizing on precisely how difficult it is).

Personally, I also have complicated feelings about the "fat acceptance" movement. I think being cruel to folks because of how they look is a fundamentally shitty thing done by fundamentally shitty people, but I also think that owning "FAT" as an identity to be celebrated -- when for many it's born out of harmful compulsive behaviors -- is counter-productive.

I've struggled with weight my entire life, been various degrees of overweight and obese through the years, and in all that time if you asked me to name the main source of anxiety and negative feelings in my ife... I would lie and say that it's something about my professional life. But the truth is it would be my weight. It's always there, as big or as small as I manage to get myself, as many diets or workout regimens as I submit myself to, it's the ever-present malaise that permeates every other aspect of my life. I think that's true for a lot of fat folks.

Over the years I've been able to make it manageable by focusing on my mental health, which has a sort of trickle-down effect to other aspects of life. I'm a pretty happy person these days. I work out regularly (though not as regularly as I should) and I try to eat healthy (though I still indulge myself from time to time). I'm not in the best shape of my life, but also not the worst. It's a balancing act, and it's tricky not to tip the scale (lol) in the direction of self-loathing.

well said, friend

[tree_]

Yes, thanks Jorge -- GREAT post.

I've watched this dumpster fire thread unfold, but Jorge's post finally compelled me to weigh in:

My mom is overweight. Not morbidly obese, but fairly heavy for her height. On a purely physical level, her cause is a combination of genetics, poor diet choices, and a near-total lack of exercise. It drove me crazy for years. As a teenager I was simply embarrassed, and in my twenties it shifted to more of a genuine concern for her wellness. My approaches to changing her varied from trying to coax her into better eating, getting exercise, trying to shame her... All shitty misplaced stuff.

The situation came to a nasty head back around 2005 or so, when we had a huge blowout. She was in tears, I felt horrible. I came to accept that it was a complex issue for her, and not something she felt terribly inclined to figure out...

But mostly, it was none of my fucking business. The argument about shared healthcare premiums doesn't really care much weight, because that's a deeply flawed industry and the metrics are fucked anyway.

She's a happy person. She's not immobile -- far from it. She gardens like a fiend, has recently gotten into beekeeping, makes pottery, knits. She also spent her entire career as a nurse, taking great physical care of everyone but herself. She knows this and she's fine with.

Thanks again Jorge. Really great post.

Not to be drowned out, another great post. Thank you trag.

[Ello Sailor]

I'm not talking about you dopes rocking dad bods. I'm talking about morbid obesity and enabling culture.

[Ello Sailor]

This is about health, not appearance.

you guys should pick one, might go somewhere.

Who's "you guys"? I speak for myself.

You and Verb

I wasn't addressing you.

Spike and I speak with one voice

Can you also hit the treadmill for him?

[E.H. Ruddock]

Mental health issues cause the government money in health care as well. You guys going to shame everyone that is depressed seeking help? "Just be happy you dicks, quit being so sad. It's really easy"

[tree_]

Mental health issues cause the government money in health care as well. You guys going to shame everyone that is depressed seeking help? "Just be happy you dicks, quit being so sad. It's really easy"

"I'm happy, fit and healthy so everyone else should be too!! It's easy"

[JuanHamm]

This is about health, not appearance.

you guys should pick one, might go somewhere.

Who's "you guys"? I speak for myself.

You and Verb

I wasn't addressing you.

Spike and I speak with one voice

Can you also hit the treadmill for him?

I don't run.

[lennytheweedwhacker]

Yes, thanks Jorge -- GREAT post.

I've watched this dumpster fire thread unfold, but Jorge's post finally compelled me to weigh in:

My mom is overweight. Not morbidly obese, but fairly heavy for her height. On a purely physical level, her cause is a combination of genetics, poor diet choices, and a near-total lack of exercise. It drove me crazy for years. As a teenager I was simply embarrassed, and in my twenties it shifted to more of a genuine concern for her wellness. My approaches to changing her varied from trying to coax her into better eating, getting exercise, trying to shame her... All shitty misplaced stuff.

The situation came to a nasty head back around 2005 or so, when we had a huge blowout. She was in tears, I felt horrible. I came to accept that it was a complex issue for her, and not something she felt terribly inclined to figure out...

But mostly, it was none of my fucking business. The argument about shared healthcare premiums doesn't really care much weight, because that's a deeply flawed industry and the metrics are fucked anyway.

She's a happy person. She's not immobile -- far from it. She gardens like a fiend, has recently gotten into beekeeping, makes pottery, knits. She also spent her entire career as a nurse, taking great physical care of everyone but herself. She knows this and she's fine with.

Thanks again Jorge. Really great post.

Not to be drowned out, another great post. Thank you trag.

other than being a nurse and having a falling out about it, this is very similar to my mom

i did make an offhand comment about it when I was like 10 years old that really hurt her…i always feel so bad when I think about it

[Ello Sailor]

I hope all of your portly loved ones stick around for a long time, and I mean that.

[Ello Sailor]

Now is the time for healing.

[JuanHamm]

How do you feel about fat comedians getting fit? Is it worth trading most of their material for a longer life?

[Ello Sailor]

What the fuck, Tommy.

[verb_to_trust]

So I guess we all agree that people's decisions on this are part of complex issues and should remain private. We shouldn't be shaming anyone into doing anything they may have valid reasons for being apprehensive about.

Oh shit! I thought this was the covid thread and we were talking about vaccines. Carry on.

[B]

A fat person won't give you fatness, verb.

[verb_to_trust]

A fat person won't give you fatness, verb.

Especially if you have already vaccinated yourself against fatness with diet and exercise!!

[lennytheweedwhacker]

What the fuck, Tommy.

It’s a good question

[spike]

This is about health, not appearance.

you guys should pick one, might go somewhere.

Who's "you guys"? I speak for myself.

You and Verb

I wasn't addressing you.

Spike and I speak with one voice

nah soma is on the health tip, while tree is on the appearance tip. two ships.