Page 69 of 76
Re: RMers with kids
Posted: Tue April 01, 2025 3:31 pm
by Self
26 and 28 when we had our first two. 35 when we had our last. I can't say the challenges or rewards were any different, as far as my age is concerned. we did have to get a goddamn minivan when the last one arrived, though.
Re: RMers with kids
Posted: Tue April 01, 2025 10:10 pm
by spike
Self wrote:26 and 28 when we had our first two. 35 when we had our last. I can't say the challenges or rewards were any different, as far as my age is concerned. we did have to get a goddamn minivan when the last one arrived, though.
*defeatedly rides escalator, carrying diapers*
Re: RMers with kids
Posted: Mon April 07, 2025 5:19 am
by spike
First day of school holidays, so I took the kid out on errands. Unfortunately, she’s not past the I want something phase when we do. Managed to funnel her towards the cheap crap and she ended up selecting a $3 bag of pom pom balls in assorted colors. Two hours later and she’s still happily gluing them to drawings or gluing them together to make snowmen. Best purchase ever.
Re: RMers with kids
Posted: Tue April 08, 2025 12:49 am
by daft twat
Oldest turned 18 yesterday. That was quick.
Re: RMers with kids
Posted: Wed April 16, 2025 9:50 pm
by Monkey_Driven
daft twat wrote:Oldest turned 18 yesterday. That was quick.
Our little guy turned 4 yesterday. He is suddenly a real person now. It's all so quick.
Re: RMers with kids
Posted: Wed April 16, 2025 9:53 pm
by Chris_H_2
daft twat wrote:Oldest turned 18 yesterday. That was quick.
what's the plan for next year?
Re: RMers with kids
Posted: Wed April 16, 2025 9:59 pm
by daft twat
Chris_H_2 wrote:daft twat wrote:Oldest turned 18 yesterday. That was quick.
what's the plan for next year?
He’s going to live at home, go to a local community college, and hopefully get a better part time job than Kohl’s. He’s running track this spring so working other than on weekends is impossible.
I wish he knew what he wanted to do (besides MMA fight), but I’m grateful to have another couple years with him around, especially since his brother will be a sophomore in high school next year and they get along.
Monkey_Driven wrote:daft twat wrote:Oldest turned 18 yesterday. That was quick.
Our little guy turned 4 yesterday. He is suddenly a real person now. It's all so quick.
Throw a pandemic in there and it goes even faster. The 18 year old really never experienced middle school. He got braces a few weeks before lockdown and they came off before the masks did.
Re: RMers with kids
Posted: Thu April 17, 2025 12:24 am
by spike
took the kid to the grands yesterday. four day easter weekend, then back to school on wednesday. just gotta get through the tuesday with a stubborn five year old who's desperately missing the structure and routine of school.
Re: RMers with kids
Posted: Thu April 24, 2025 6:24 am
by Matters
Hug your kids. Tell them you love them. Try not to yell. Tell them you’re proud of them.
A childhood friend of mine lost her teenage daughter last week to a car accident. I’ve spent much of the last few days going back and forth between crying with friends and family and renewing my love for pearl jam as a distraction.
Hug your kids. Tell them you love them. Try not to yell. Tell them you’re proud of them.
Re: RMers with kids
Posted: Thu April 24, 2025 8:51 am
by spike
Hair cut and a flu shot for the kid tonight. Wife said she couldn’t come due to work obligations, then sends me a pic of her in the pool.

Re: RMers with kids
Posted: Thu April 24, 2025 11:23 am
by wease
She totally fucked you on that
Re: RMers with kids
Posted: Thu April 24, 2025 11:39 am
by spike
we got home and she's in pajamas with a glass of wine. i'm mailing it in this weekend.
Re: RMers with kids
Posted: Thu April 24, 2025 11:55 am
by Bi_3
Matters wrote:
Hug your kids. Tell them you love them. Try not to yell. Tell them you’re proud of them.
Every fucking day no matter what.
Re: RMers with kids
Posted: Thu April 24, 2025 12:16 pm
by Higgs
My kids know they're loved and know I'm proud of them. Thanks for the reminder though Matters - always appreciated.
Re: RMers with kids
Posted: Thu April 24, 2025 12:45 pm
by tragabigzanda
Carl Sandburg wrote:There is a wolf in me . . . fangs pointed for tearing gashes . . . a red tongue for raw meat . . . and the hot lapping of blood—I keep this wolf because the wilderness gave it to me and the wilderness will not let it go.
There is a fox in me . . . a silver-gray fox . . . I sniff and guess . . . I pick things out of the wind and air . . . I nose in the dark night and take sleepers and eat them and hide the feathers . . . I circle and loop and double-cross.
There is a hog in me . . . a snout and a belly . . . a machinery for eating and grunting . . . a machinery for sleeping satisfied in the sun—I got this too from the wilderness and the wilderness will not let it go.
There is a fish in me . . . I know I came from salt-blue water-gates . . . I scurried with shoals of herring . . . I blew waterspouts with porpoises . . . before land was . . . before the water went down . . . before Noah . . . before the first chapter of Genesis.
There is a baboon in me . . . clambering-clawed . . . dog-faced . . . yawping a galoot's hunger . . . hairy under the armpits . . . here are the hawk-eyed hankering men . . . here are the blonde and blue-eyed women . . . here they hide curled asleep waiting . . . ready to snarl and kill . . . ready to sing and give milk . . . waiting—I keep the baboon because the wilderness says so.
There is an eagle in me and a mockingbird . . . and the eagle flies among the Rocky Mountains of my dreams and fights among the Sierra crags of what I want . . . and the mockingbird warbles in the early forenoon before the dew is gone, warbles in the underbrush of my Chattanoogas of hope, gushes over the blue Ozark foothills of my wishes—And I got the eagle and the mockingbird from the wilderness.
O, I got a zoo, I got a menagerie, inside my ribs, under my bony head, under my red-valve heart—and I got something else: it is a man-child heart, a woman-child heart: it is a father and mother and lover: it came from God-Knows-Where: it is going to God-Knows-Where—For I am the keeper of the zoo: I say yes and no: I sing and kill and work: I am a pal of the world: I came from the wilderness.
Re: RMers with kids
Posted: Thu April 24, 2025 6:26 pm
by Monkey_Driven
I ask my kids some combination of "did you try your best today?", "what are you curious about? what did you learn?", and/or "what was the best part of your day?" every night. We always tell them how much they're loved.
Just awful news, Matters.
Re: RMers with kids
Posted: Sat May 10, 2025 1:45 am
by daft twat
My youngest son has been a late bloomer. He’s usually been the smallest in his peer group. He lost his last baby teeth last summer at 14. I don’t think he’s weighed enough until the past year to sit in the front-seat of the car. On Monday he got his learner’s permit. His i.d. says 5’6”, and on Thursday he got Invisaligns.
My oldest (18), meanwhile, got pulled over for speeding for the first time on Tuesday. He got off with a warning, and we had, I thought, a good heart to heart about real world consequences. Today he called to tell me he got into a parking lot fender bender. The accident, I don’t care too much about, but it wasn’t in the school parking lot because he was skipping school. His explanation began with excuses.
He’s graduating in less than a month, and I’m not one of those parents who is relieved because it was never in doubt, but I also find I’m not the least bit excited either. He’s rudderless and selfish. He’s going to a junior college in the fall, which is fine and a good financial decision. I did this as well. But I had an idea of what I might do. He has none, and he doesn’t seem to be concerned with anything other than sating his own wants. He’s not exactly Meursault from the Stranger, but he never puts anyone else first. He’s not drinking or smoking or gambling or even focused on a girl, but I still feel just blah. I guess I expected to feel differently about my own son’s graduation than I do. I thought I’d feel a sense of sadness and joy and accomplishment, but I honestly feel none of that at the moment.
Re: RMers with kids
Posted: Sat May 10, 2025 3:29 am
by spike
There’s the ideal of parenting, then there’s what it’s really like. Sorry this milestone is a disappointment, but you’re a good dad and these are the kind of moments that you’ll rise to and find a way to appreciate and make the best of for all involved. The real work that you’ll feel the proudest of.
Re: RMers with kids
Posted: Sat May 10, 2025 4:34 am
by Monkey_Driven
I've worked with college students for 15+ years. There is such a thing as emotional/mindset late bloomers, especially with males. Continue to be a supportive presence and he will come around.
Re: RMers with kids
Posted: Tue June 03, 2025 11:03 am
by spike
I had to put my unruly and cranky five year old to bed at 6pm last night. Then today, she was a dream after school, initiating her own homework, general calmness and patience. Heck, she even wanted to do the rest of her weekly homework so she could get more from the teacher tomorrow. Just crazy what a rollercoaster these years can be and I’m just hanging on for dear life sometimes.