Red Mosquito

I was a waiter at Buca di Beppo after college. An Italian joint which, if you’re not familiar, always has a booth in the kitchen that people like to reserve because the novelty makes it feel like a special occasion I guess. Anyway one day I was working and knew some of my food was about to come up on the line and, being a weeknight, I wasn’t busy so I went to wait for the prep folks to set it out so I could take it to the table nice and fresh. I leaned back on the kitchen booth table and had an itch in my, well, arse. So, being alone in the kitchen I decided to scratch it. Thoroughly. After which I stood up and saw out of the corner of my eye that there was a couple sitting at the table, probably on a date. Because of the horseshoe shape of the booth and the fact that they were snuggle up all the way in the middle, I hadn’t seen them and had just given them an absolute horror show. I mean, I only scratched on the outside of my pants but still.

Anyway I was a Pearl Jam fan at the time.

lvc wrote:I was a waiter at Buca di Beppo after college. An Italian joint which, if you’re not familiar, always has a booth in the kitchen that people like to reserve because the novelty makes it feel like a special occasion I guess. Anyway one day I was working and knew some of my food was about to come up on the line and, being a weeknight, I wasn’t busy so I went to wait for the prep folks to set it out so I could take it to the table nice and fresh. I leaned back on the kitchen booth table and had an itch in my, well, arse. So, being alone in the kitchen I decided to scratch it. Thoroughly. After which I stood up and saw out of the corner of my eye that there was a couple sitting at the table, probably on a date. Because of the horseshoe shape of the booth and the fact that they were snuggle up all the way in the middle, I hadn’t seen them and had just given them an absolute horror show. I mean, I only scratched on the outside of my pants but still.

Anyway I was a Pearl Jam fan at the time.

Were you singing Alive while this was happening?

wease wrote:

lvc wrote:I was a waiter at Buca di Beppo after college. An Italian joint which, if you’re not familiar, always has a booth in the kitchen that people like to reserve because the novelty makes it feel like a special occasion I guess. Anyway one day I was working and knew some of my food was about to come up on the line and, being a weeknight, I wasn’t busy so I went to wait for the prep folks to set it out so I could take it to the table nice and fresh. I leaned back on the kitchen booth table and had an itch in my, well, arse. So, being alone in the kitchen I decided to scratch it. Thoroughly. After which I stood up and saw out of the corner of my eye that there was a couple sitting at the table, probably on a date. Because of the horseshoe shape of the booth and the fact that they were snuggle up all the way in the middle, I hadn’t seen them and had just given them an absolute horror show. I mean, I only scratched on the outside of my pants but still.

Anyway I was a Pearl Jam fan at the time.

Were you singing Alive while this was happening?

Inside Job

Doo the Evolution

Wish I’d had a rear view mirror.

Scratch me, Sniff me

Non-Elderly Male In Front of a Table In a Medium-sized Town


I sometimes wonder if that was a moment that galvanized the couple and laughter over the egregious ass scratch right before their eyes was the catalyst for a lifetime of happiness or whether the revulsion crept into the way they viewed one another and slowly poisoned their romance.