Solo: A Star Wars Story (5/25/2018)

[BurtReynolds]

Lol that's not remotely interesting

[epilogue]

Oh, okay. My bad.

[BurtReynolds]

Brb I gotta go make a movie where Hulk dies of cancer because what a twist this is real life!

[LoathedVermin72]

Everybody dies, Burt.

Yes but not everyone dies a divorced loser...and at the hands of their son

Exactly. That's some interesting shit right there.

Ugh

[epilogue]

you high, burt?

[epilogue]

Everybody dies, Burt.

Yes but not everyone dies a divorced loser...and at the hands of their son

Exactly. That's some interesting shit right there.

Ugh

Still my favorite argument.

[LoathedVermin72]

Everybody dies, Burt.

Yes but not everyone dies a divorced loser...and at the hands of their son

Exactly. That's some interesting shit right there.

Ugh

Still my favorite argument.

I’ll try to do better, friend.

[epilogue]

Everybody dies, Burt.

Yes but not everyone dies a divorced loser...and at the hands of their son

Exactly. That's some interesting shit right there.

Ugh

Still my favorite argument.

I’ll try to do better, friend.

No you won't.

[epilogue]

But it's okay. It's all so completely meaningless anyway.

[dimejinky99]

Everybody dies, Burt.

Yes but not everyone dies a divorced loser...and at the hands of their son

Exactly. That's some interesting shit right there.

I feel like LV is making the case for this movie in one post eh joey?

[BurtReynolds]

burt likes it when everyone lives happily ever after and nothing changes

Change? CHANGE!? I pray to God for some change from this goddamn franchise! Anything but a war between imperials and rebels that has been going on for like... what... sixty years?! and has cost untold billions of lives and has utterly destroyed the protagonists?!

Christ that's depressing. It hangs over everything in the world now, past and present. This isn't some fun adventure movie franchise. It's a goddamn dystopian hellscape from which the heroes have no chance of escape. Thanks to TFA, we know there will always be an endless horde of literal nazis with endless supplies of planet killing super weapons. Nothing anyone does here matters. Only death and slavery await all life in the universe.

What a tragedy.

[malice]

burt likes it when everyone lives happily ever after and nothing changes

Change? CHANGE!? I pray to God for some change from this goddamn franchise! Anything but a war between imperials and rebels that has been going on for like... what... sixty years?! and has cost untold billions of lives and has utterly destroyed the protagonists?!

Christ that's depressing. It hangs over everything in the world now, past and present. This isn't some fun adventure movie franchise. It's a goddamn dystopian hellscape from which the heroes have no chance of escape. Thanks to TFA, we know there will always be an endless horde of literal nazis with endless supplies of planet killing super weapons. Nothing anyone does here matters. Only death and slavery await all life in the universe.

What a tragedy.

thanks Obama!

[BurtReynolds]

I mean, sure, there can always be new challenges. They don't have to live happily ever after. There will always be new ways to force the characters to grow or fail. New factions, both within and without, could threaten to destroy them. hell, they could even be old enemies returning. But, fuck, not this. This is stagnation.

[BurtReynolds]

thanks Obama!

When is Trump gonna build the space wall?

[darth_vedder]

Burt gets it.

[BurtReynolds]

I love watching Return of the Jedi now, knowing that, rather than it being a happy ending, turns out the rebellion is slowly crushed, the imperials emerge stronger and more brutal than ever, Han and Leia have a child that turns out to be literally Hitler x100000000 then they break up, and Luke loses faith in everything he's ever believed and totally gives up until it's too late to make any real difference.

Such a fun franchise.

[dimejinky99]

I love watching Return of the Jedi now, knowing that, rather than it being a happy ending, turns out the rebellion is slowly crushed, the imperials emerge stronger and more brutal than ever, Han and Leia have a child that turns out to be literally Hitler x100000000 then they break up, and Luke loses faith in everything he's ever believed and totally gives up until it's too late to make any real difference.

Such a fun franchise.

I.....wow....

[BurtReynolds]

JJ Abrams presents Star Wars:

[stip]

burt likes it when everyone lives happily ever after and nothing changes

Change? CHANGE!? I pray to God for some change from this goddamn franchise! Anything but a war between imperials and rebels that has been going on for like... what... sixty years?! and has cost untold billions of lives and has utterly destroyed the protagonists?!

Christ that's depressing. It hangs over everything in the world now, past and present. This isn't some fun adventure movie franchise. It's a goddamn dystopian hellscape from which the heroes have no chance of escape. Thanks to TFA, we know there will always be an endless horde of literal nazis with endless supplies of planet killing super weapons. Nothing anyone does here matters. Only death and slavery await all life in the universe.

What a tragedy.

The rebels did win. They won for thirty years. But nothing lasts forever


This is probably how people felt at the end of Empire, too. It's this point in a three part narrative that your protagonists are supposed to be at their lowest. We'll get our happy ending. Rest easy, young Burt.


The stuff that Johnson is doing next is allegedly set in some other corner of the galaxy and completely unrelated to anything that's come before. But this is part of the saga story, which is a nine part sweep of one conflict (pretty much the same one) that runs through three generations, focused primarily around one family of particular importance. These parallels are perfectly appropriate since this is ultimately one long story

[stip]

it should also probably be noted that, at the end of Jedi, the rebels have one a great victory. But the Empire still controls, you know, the galaxy - what with their vast army and huge fleet of star destroyers and all the rest. Because the formal story ended their (not counting the EU stuff) for a long time we wrote in a 'they all lived happily ever after' ending, but that's not one that necessarily makes sense, and these new films challenge that