Million Dollar Ideas

[contamination]

Mach 3 cheese slicer that would give you not 1, not 2, but 3 slices at once.

[BurtReynolds]

bagels without holes in them.

That’s a bun

no it's a bay-full.

[Chris_H_2]

Mach 3 cheese slicer that would give you not 1, not 2, but 3 slices at once.

do you work at a deli?

[doug rr]

Mach 3 cheese slicer that would give you not 1, not 2, but 3 slices at once.

do you work at a deli?

hopefully with a name like that

[E.H. Ruddock]

bagels without holes in them.

That’s a bun

no it's a bay-full.

Don't ever bitch about PJ puns again.

[tragabigzanda]

There is a wolf in me . . . fangs pointed for tearing gashes . . . a red tongue for raw meat . . . and the hot lapping of blood—I keep this wolf because the wilderness gave it to me and the wilderness will not let it go.

There is a fox in me . . . a silver-gray fox . . . I sniff and guess . . . I pick things out of the wind and air . . . I nose in the dark night and take sleepers and eat them and hide the feathers . . . I circle and loop and double-cross.

There is a hog in me . . . a snout and a belly . . . a machinery for eating and grunting . . . a machinery for sleeping satisfied in the sun—I got this too from the wilderness and the wilderness will not let it go.

There is a fish in me . . . I know I came from salt-blue water-gates . . . I scurried with shoals of herring . . . I blew waterspouts with porpoises . . . before land was . . . before the water went down . . . before Noah . . . before the first chapter of Genesis.

There is a baboon in me . . . clambering-clawed . . . dog-faced . . . yawping a galoot's hunger . . . hairy under the armpits . . . here are the hawk-eyed hankering men . . . here are the blonde and blue-eyed women . . . here they hide curled asleep waiting . . . ready to snarl and kill . . . ready to sing and give milk . . . waiting—I keep the baboon because the wilderness says so.

There is an eagle in me and a mockingbird . . . and the eagle flies among the Rocky Mountains of my dreams and fights among the Sierra crags of what I want . . . and the mockingbird warbles in the early forenoon before the dew is gone, warbles in the underbrush of my Chattanoogas of hope, gushes over the blue Ozark foothills of my wishes—And I got the eagle and the mockingbird from the wilderness.

O, I got a zoo, I got a menagerie, inside my ribs, under my bony head, under my red-valve heart—and I got something else: it is a man-child heart, a woman-child heart: it is a father and mother and lover: it came from God-Knows-Where: it is going to God-Knows-Where—For I am the keeper of the zoo: I say yes and no: I sing and kill and work: I am a pal of the world: I came from the wilderness.

[BurtReynolds]

i dont know why I'm getting so much pushback on this.

[tree_]

i don't think giving him money is settling well in our stomachs

[spike]

bagels without holes in them.

That’s a bun

no it's a bay-full.

Don't ever bitch about PJ puns again.

[tommy]

i don't think giving him money is settling well in our stomachs

I trust that Burt knows what's best

[wease]

i dont know why I'm getting so much pushback on this.

We’re just concerned for your mom and bro. You’ve described a definitively toxic relationship she’s in that you wished that she weren’t, and I think we’re all behind her getting out if it.

[BurtReynolds]

i dont know why I'm getting so much pushback on this.

We’re just concerned for your mom and bro. You’ve described a definitively toxic relationship she’s in that you wished that she weren’t, and I think we’re all behind her getting out if it.

Which is why you should buy my hole-less bagels!

[tree_]

oh i thought you meant more like a bage-hole, like a donut hole but bagel hole

[spike]

beige hole?

[spike]

[lvc]

As a confirmed Luddite (per the Planned Obsolescence thread), I can't believe I'm saying this. But, the AI thing in photos apps now but you attach it to a robotic pellet gun and it only fires at deer that come to eat your landscaping plants. So it recognizes both plant and animal, dials in a safe proximity range, and then blammo. Non lethal for plant and animal alike.

Of course, then it's weaponized and black people can no longer get close to Mar-a-Lago and may God have mercy on my soul what have I done...

[Bammer]

Merge this …

[E.H. Ruddock]

Not all million dollar ideas are get rich quick though. Request denied

[BurtReynolds]

[LoathedVermin72]