Red Mosquito

I guess I won't see this in theaters.

E.H. Ruddock wrote:

Simple Torture wrote:

E.H. Ruddock wrote:

Simple Torture wrote:

theplatypus wrote:

Spoiler: show

How about that friendly ball alien with the Siri voice

This is a joke, right?

Nope. It is real. So is the line "I hope you are ready for a close encounter, bitch!"

Haha you guys are hilarious. I can't wait to see what this movie is actually like when it's out on video.

Also, there was a school bus full of kids being driven by a scientist that was pivotal to preventing the end of the world.

Wait, the kids, the bus, or the driver was pivotal?

durdencommatyler wrote:

E.H. Ruddock wrote:

Simple Torture wrote:

E.H. Ruddock wrote:

Simple Torture wrote:

theplatypus wrote:

Spoiler: show

How about that friendly ball alien with the Siri voice

This is a joke, right?

Nope. It is real. So is the line "I hope you are ready for a close encounter, bitch!"

Haha you guys are hilarious. I can't wait to see what this movie is actually like when it's out on video.

Also, there was a school bus full of kids being driven by a scientist that was pivotal to preventing the end of the world.

Wait, the kids, the bus, or the driver was pivotal?

I knew it was too crazy to actually be part of the movie!

Simple Torture wrote:

durdencommatyler wrote:

E.H. Ruddock wrote:

Simple Torture wrote:

E.H. Ruddock wrote:

Simple Torture wrote:

theplatypus wrote:

Spoiler: show

How about that friendly ball alien with the Siri voice

This is a joke, right?

Nope. It is real. So is the line "I hope you are ready for a close encounter, bitch!"

Haha you guys are hilarious. I can't wait to see what this movie is actually like when it's out on video.

Also, there was a school bus full of kids being driven by a scientist that was pivotal to preventing the end of the world.

Wait, the kids, the bus, or the driver was pivotal?

I knew it was too crazy to actually be part of the movie!

The scene comes right after Jeff Goldblum drives a little person on a rascal across the dessert to impress Sela Ward.

durdencommatyler wrote:

Simple Torture wrote:

durdencommatyler wrote:

E.H. Ruddock wrote:

Simple Torture wrote:

E.H. Ruddock wrote:

Simple Torture wrote:

theplatypus wrote:

Spoiler: show

How about that friendly ball alien with the Siri voice

This is a joke, right?

Nope. It is real. So is the line "I hope you are ready for a close encounter, bitch!"

Haha you guys are hilarious. I can't wait to see what this movie is actually like when it's out on video.

Also, there was a school bus full of kids being driven by a scientist that was pivotal to preventing the end of the world.

Wait, the kids, the bus, or the driver was pivotal?

I knew it was too crazy to actually be part of the movie!

The scene comes right after Jeff Goldblum drives a little person on a rascal across the dessert to impress Sela Ward.

How dare you

Simple Torture wrote:

durdencommatyler wrote:

Simple Torture wrote:

durdencommatyler wrote:

E.H. Ruddock wrote:

Simple Torture wrote:

E.H. Ruddock wrote:

Simple Torture wrote:

theplatypus wrote:

Spoiler: show

How about that friendly ball alien with the Siri voice

This is a joke, right?

Nope. It is real. So is the line "I hope you are ready for a close encounter, bitch!"

Haha you guys are hilarious. I can't wait to see what this movie is actually like when it's out on video.

Also, there was a school bus full of kids being driven by a scientist that was pivotal to preventing the end of the world.

Wait, the kids, the bus, or the driver was pivotal?

I knew it was too crazy to actually be part of the movie!

The scene comes right after Jeff Goldblum drives a little person on a rascal across the dessert to impress Sela Ward.

How dare you

It didn't work. However, Sela Ward did later rape an unconscious Randy Quaid.

durdencommatyler wrote:

E.H. Ruddock wrote:

Simple Torture wrote:

E.H. Ruddock wrote:

Simple Torture wrote:

theplatypus wrote:

Spoiler: show

How about that friendly ball alien with the Siri voice

This is a joke, right?

Nope. It is real. So is the line "I hope you are ready for a close encounter, bitch!"

Haha you guys are hilarious. I can't wait to see what this movie is actually like when it's out on video.

Also, there was a school bus full of kids being driven by a scientist that was pivotal to preventing the end of the world.

Wait, the kids, the bus, or the driver was pivotal?

Yep!

Things that actually happened in this movie:

A main character survives a tidal wave that was so big it crushed cities but set his boat down in the desert with him still in his seat

A school bus was able to evade a giant pissed of alien that was bigger than Godzilla and it even had a space gun

A rebel leader from Africa can kill all the aliens he wants with nothing but a machete, even when they have guns

An artifical intelligence that ages ago was actual beings that shed their bodies came to warn us about another attack. It called humans primitive, but then when we won the battle it asked us to lead the fight elsewhere in the universe

lol

I actually kinda wanted to watch a whole movie of that warlord guy hunting aliens. Like a Predator kind of deal.

theplatypus wrote:I actually kinda wanted to watch a whole movie of that warlord guy hunting aliens. Like a Predator kind of deal.

Yeah his backstory of his fighting them seemed way more interesting than anything else in the movie

E.H. Ruddock wrote:

theplatypus wrote:I actually kinda wanted to watch a whole movie of that warlord guy hunting aliens. Like a Predator kind of deal.

Yeah his backstory of his fighting them seemed way more interesting than anything else in the movie

As long as that fucking nerd warrior isn't involved

I fucking called this turd. Not that it wasn't obvious from the beginning. Though it sounds so much worse than I even imagined.

I'm so intrigued that I might download a bootleg.

LoathedVermin72 wrote:

E.H. Ruddock wrote:

theplatypus wrote:I actually kinda wanted to watch a whole movie of that warlord guy hunting aliens. Like a Predator kind of deal.

Yeah his backstory of his fighting them seemed way more interesting than anything else in the movie

As long as that fucking nerd warrior isn't involved

Oh yeah i forgot about the nerdy guy that was a government accountant or something and by the end of the movie he was a trained alien fighter

This movie ranks up there with the last Transformers for me as far as a HUGE missed opportunity. This had that Warlord guy who seemed to have a cool backstory. Would have loved to see a movie about that. The last Transformers had that really cool bounty hunter transformer that could have been a cool story instead of dinosaurs.

E.H. Ruddock wrote:Things that actually happened in this movie:

A main character survives a tidal wave that was so big it crushed cities but set his boat down in the desert with him still in his seat

A school bus was able to evade a giant pissed of alien that was bigger than Godzilla and it even had a space gun

A rebel leader from Africa can kill all the aliens he wants with nothing but a machete, even when they have guns

An artifical intelligence that ages ago was actual beings that shed their bodies came to warn us about another attack. It called humans primitive, but then when we won the battle it asked us to lead the fight elsewhere in the universe

That is both sad and hilarious.

E.H. Ruddock wrote:Things that actually happened in this movie:

A main character survives a tidal wave that was so big it crushed cities but set his boat down in the desert with him still in his seat

A school bus was able to evade a giant pissed of alien that was bigger than Godzilla and it even had a space gun

A rebel leader from Africa can kill all the aliens he wants with nothing but a machete, even when they have guns

An artifical intelligence that ages ago was actual beings that shed their bodies came to warn us about another attack. It called humans primitive, but then when we won the battle it asked us to lead the fight elsewhere in the universe

E.H. Ruddock wrote:

theplatypus wrote:I actually kinda wanted to watch a whole movie of that warlord guy hunting aliens. Like a Predator kind of deal.

Yeah his backstory of his fighting them seemed way more interesting than anything else in the movie

Because I was stuck on a plane for 13 hours twice in the last month I had time to read the book that bridged the two movies and this was explained. It's not a great explanation but in-universe it makes some sense: there's an alien ship that landed - as in not crashed but on purpose - in his part of Africa and the people there figured out that guns don't work on the aliens armor but machetes do great, kind of like a knife and an oyster situation.

It's a really short read, maybe took me all of 4 hours if that? But it explains why Will Smith isn't there, it explains a little bit about how the technology expanded, and it's funny how it explains why China is in the movie besides their film market money.

bune wrote:

E.H. Ruddock wrote:Things that actually happened in this movie:

A main character survives a tidal wave that was so big it crushed cities but set his boat down in the desert with him still in his seat

A school bus was able to evade a giant pissed of alien that was bigger than Godzilla and it even had a space gun

A rebel leader from Africa can kill all the aliens he wants with nothing but a machete, even when they have guns

An artifical intelligence that ages ago was actual beings that shed their bodies came to warn us about another attack. It called humans primitive, but then when we won the battle it asked us to lead the fight elsewhere in the universe

E.H. Ruddock wrote:

theplatypus wrote:I actually kinda wanted to watch a whole movie of that warlord guy hunting aliens. Like a Predator kind of deal.

Yeah his backstory of his fighting them seemed way more interesting than anything else in the movie

Because I was stuck on a plane for 13 hours twice in the last month I had time to read the book that bridged the two movies and this was explained. It's not a great explanation but in-universe it makes some sense: there's an alien ship that landed - as in not crashed but on purpose - in his part of Africa and the people there figured out that guns don't work on the aliens armor but machetes do great, kind of like a knife and an oyster situation.

It's a really short read, maybe took me all of 4 hours if that? But it explains why Will Smith isn't there, it explains a little bit about how the technology expanded, and it's funny how it explains why China is in the movie besides their film market money.

can we ban bada for not only reading this book, but just generally being aware of its existence.

I wish there were a way i could watch this tonight without having to go to the theater