Talk about your day thread

[VinylGuy]

Congrats!

[dad]

My brother just asked me to officiate at his wedding in Ireland, I am so stoked

Nice. Beautiful place.

[Jorge]

I've never been

[dad]

I bet you made your brothers day. That’s very sweet of you.

Where in Ireland is the wedding? Will you need to get ordained?

[Jorge]

I'm already ordained, I officiated at my sister's wedding 3 years ago. Don't know where in Ireland it is, but it's in June 2024 so I have some time to find out

[bodysnatcher]

don't quote a bjork song please

[The Argonaut]

That's really exciting news

[lennytheweedwhacker]

Have a great time and safe travels.

[Ello Sailor]

don't quote a bjork song please

You're thinking of Iceland.

[The Argonaut]

Don't quote a U2 song, please

[lennytheweedwhacker]

don't quote a bjork song please

You're thinking of Iceland.

No you're thinking of Iceland.

[Ello Sailor]

Do quote a B*Witched song, please.

[tragabigzanda]

There is a wolf in me . . . fangs pointed for tearing gashes . . . a red tongue for raw meat . . . and the hot lapping of blood—I keep this wolf because the wilderness gave it to me and the wilderness will not let it go.

There is a fox in me . . . a silver-gray fox . . . I sniff and guess . . . I pick things out of the wind and air . . . I nose in the dark night and take sleepers and eat them and hide the feathers . . . I circle and loop and double-cross.

There is a hog in me . . . a snout and a belly . . . a machinery for eating and grunting . . . a machinery for sleeping satisfied in the sun—I got this too from the wilderness and the wilderness will not let it go.

There is a fish in me . . . I know I came from salt-blue water-gates . . . I scurried with shoals of herring . . . I blew waterspouts with porpoises . . . before land was . . . before the water went down . . . before Noah . . . before the first chapter of Genesis.

There is a baboon in me . . . clambering-clawed . . . dog-faced . . . yawping a galoot's hunger . . . hairy under the armpits . . . here are the hawk-eyed hankering men . . . here are the blonde and blue-eyed women . . . here they hide curled asleep waiting . . . ready to snarl and kill . . . ready to sing and give milk . . . waiting—I keep the baboon because the wilderness says so.

There is an eagle in me and a mockingbird . . . and the eagle flies among the Rocky Mountains of my dreams and fights among the Sierra crags of what I want . . . and the mockingbird warbles in the early forenoon before the dew is gone, warbles in the underbrush of my Chattanoogas of hope, gushes over the blue Ozark foothills of my wishes—And I got the eagle and the mockingbird from the wilderness.

O, I got a zoo, I got a menagerie, inside my ribs, under my bony head, under my red-valve heart—and I got something else: it is a man-child heart, a woman-child heart: it is a father and mother and lover: it came from God-Knows-Where: it is going to God-Knows-Where—For I am the keeper of the zoo: I say yes and no: I sing and kill and work: I am a pal of the world: I came from the wilderness.

[dad]

Don’t quote a shellac song.

[Ello Sailor]

[VinylGuy]

Jorge and Dime set to meet!

[tragabigzanda]

There is a wolf in me . . . fangs pointed for tearing gashes . . . a red tongue for raw meat . . . and the hot lapping of blood—I keep this wolf because the wilderness gave it to me and the wilderness will not let it go.

There is a fox in me . . . a silver-gray fox . . . I sniff and guess . . . I pick things out of the wind and air . . . I nose in the dark night and take sleepers and eat them and hide the feathers . . . I circle and loop and double-cross.

There is a hog in me . . . a snout and a belly . . . a machinery for eating and grunting . . . a machinery for sleeping satisfied in the sun—I got this too from the wilderness and the wilderness will not let it go.

There is a fish in me . . . I know I came from salt-blue water-gates . . . I scurried with shoals of herring . . . I blew waterspouts with porpoises . . . before land was . . . before the water went down . . . before Noah . . . before the first chapter of Genesis.

There is a baboon in me . . . clambering-clawed . . . dog-faced . . . yawping a galoot's hunger . . . hairy under the armpits . . . here are the hawk-eyed hankering men . . . here are the blonde and blue-eyed women . . . here they hide curled asleep waiting . . . ready to snarl and kill . . . ready to sing and give milk . . . waiting—I keep the baboon because the wilderness says so.

There is an eagle in me and a mockingbird . . . and the eagle flies among the Rocky Mountains of my dreams and fights among the Sierra crags of what I want . . . and the mockingbird warbles in the early forenoon before the dew is gone, warbles in the underbrush of my Chattanoogas of hope, gushes over the blue Ozark foothills of my wishes—And I got the eagle and the mockingbird from the wilderness.

O, I got a zoo, I got a menagerie, inside my ribs, under my bony head, under my red-valve heart—and I got something else: it is a man-child heart, a woman-child heart: it is a father and mother and lover: it came from God-Knows-Where: it is going to God-Knows-Where—For I am the keeper of the zoo: I say yes and no: I sing and kill and work: I am a pal of the world: I came from the wilderness.

[Jorge]

"FUCKING KILL HIM. FUCKING KILL HIM. KILL HIM ALREADY KILL HIM"

[Jorge]

Jorge I have to officiate a wedding in 2024. Any tips?

My tips from having done this twice now, and seeing other people do it, are:

1- Beyond your own speech, work out with the couple how you'd like to have the ceremony structured. Make sure everyone's on the same page.
2- Make it a story. If you've been asked to officiate then you probably know the couple very well, so you can map out the story of their love in an engaging way
3- Be funny of course, but it's not a standup routine. Rein it in a bit. Keep the focus on the couple. No one's there to see The Trag Show.
4- Rehearse it a lot. Cue cards are useful, but don't read the whole thing. If you can give your speech in a way that seems extemporaneous it's a lot cooler than if you're reading verbatim from a piece of paper.
5- Keep it tight. 10 minutes is the sweet spot.
6- Maybe it's corny but I like to include a moment where I ask the couple to turn around and face the guests, so they can see all the different people who've come together to celebrate their union and really take it all in. It's a poignant moment and it makes the guests feel part of it.

[VinylGuy]

There you go Trag, can’t miss now