TL;DR - I had maybe the best week of my life with my youngest son.
I bought my now 15-year-old a guitar when he was younger, thinking he’d find it an outlet that wasn’t an Xbox. He took lessons for a year. It didn’t take. He wasn’t into it. He’s just not into music, really. Even now he lifts weights in silence like a fucking psycho.
One day his younger brother, who was 10 at the time, asked if he could take lessons. It was totally unprompted. I said yes, but I tempered my expectations. He went to lessons and diligently did 20 minutes of practice every day - no more, no less. It was like reading.
In the past year, he discovered Metallica. It had nothing to do with me. I was never into them, really. I finally saw them in concert in 08 or 09 just to say I saw them. Through YouTube, he was turned on to more songs and in trying to foster his love for music, I started listening to them more. Meanwhile, he started having days where he’d play until his fingers hurt.
In February, they announced two US shows in Buffalo and Pittsburgh. I bought tickets for both, knowing we couldn’t afford to fly and that Buffalo is a 14 hour drive.
Today I made the 13 hour drive home from Pittsburgh after what was possibly the best week of my life.
We drove 10 hours last Tuesday and stayed in a shitty days inn. We woke up, drove the remaining 4 hours to Buffalo, and went to the Def Leppard/Motley Crue/Poison/Joan Jett show. They were mainly playing hits, and he mainly knew them all. Aside from Vince Neil, everyone was great. It was an appetizer show and it delivered like a main course. Def Leppard does not get enough credit for delivering the hits while still being a legitimate working band (they dated to play 4 songs off their new album).
On Thursday we went to Niagara Falls, crossed the border into Canada for better views, had a great meal in downtown Buffalo, and then went to his first Metallica show. Here are two things I will remember: 1) While waiting for them to come on stage he said, “Let’s play I spy.” I sighed. He said, “I spy with my little eye someone in a black t-shirt.” I laughed hard. 2) After the show as we were walking to our car he said, “I can’t believe I was just in the same building as Metallica.”
I had that same thought about PJ in 95.
On Friday we backtracked to Cleveland and visited the Rock n Roll Hall of Fame. They have a garage band level, and there are some musicians there with a menu of songs you can play with them. My son played For Whom the Bell Tolls with them. It wasn’t perfect, but it was public and his first time playing with anyone else. He was buzzing and it was the high point of the trip for me. So proud!
Saturday we went to Pittsburgh and visited the Carnegie Museums of Art and Natural History. The first thing this kid ever loved was dinosaurs. He was fucking skipping around the exhibit. We ate lunch in the cafeteria called “Fossil Fuel.’” My God, I love that. We then rode the Duquesne Incline before going to the Airbnb to watch Lightyear and Toy Story immediately afterward.
On Sunday he watched Toy Story 2 in the morning and then we visited the Heinz Historical Center to check out the Mister Rogers sets. We walked down to the big fountain where the 3 rivers meet and then returned to our room to rest up for Metallica. Watched Toy Story 3, and when Andy’s mom had that little hitch in her breath as she realized he was heading off to school, I was a crying mess. I realized then that I was in the midst of maybe the best time of my life and that it would be over before I knew it.
The concert that night was turning into a disappointing song-for-song repeat of Buffalo. Then in the encore they made one change. They played Battery, which was the song both of us were hoping for. We hugged in realization as the first few notes played.
We got back to our room at 11. I finally fell asleep at 2. We began our 13 hour drive at 4. I’m leaving some personal details out of this too long narrative, but if you read all of this and you’re a parent, I hope you’re encouraged by it. I feel some guilt because I know my oldest son and I cannot have this same experience, but that isn’t either of our faults. It was such a privilege, though, to be able to spend this time with just my youngest son. My dad is a better man than me, but he would have never done this. If I’m lucky enough to have a death bed scenario, I bet I think of this week more than anything else.
