Red Mosquito

bart wrote:Alien Covenant is a fundamentally stupid movie. On every level. It is a perfect example of the Star Wars/Marvel-ization of everything everywhere. Whereas the first two movies throw together groups of people who look and act like teams of professionals dealing with a challenge in a very Howard hawks way, Prometheus and covenant have their characters say things like “alas, the captaincy of this ship was taken from me, for I am a man of faith!” This is a movie that shows someone mountain repelling without a safety line and then has a character say “listen, we’re climbing a mountain without a safety line here!” Then for the finale, she has to…repel down the ship. Truly a character arc from the Ritalin addled mind of a sophomore film student.

Yes this film is truly misunderstood, it takes a keen knowledge of culture to understand they were going for gothic horror. Otherwise one could miss when they have the villain explain his evil scheme while in a dungeon laboratory filled with his creations. We could also miss when they literally make a point to name check Mary Shelley’s husband. Just too subtle for your average non-film expert, I guess.

I laughed out loud, and not in a good way, at several points. Apparently the entire crew all went the exact opposite way they should have gone to explore the planet when the ship landed - had they gone seemingly a short amount of time in any other direction they may have noticed the gargantuan imitation-Mecca the aliens built, rather than poke around some fucking woods and caves. We see a character (was she supppsed to be a pilot? A medical person? I can’t recall) IMMEDIATELY panic when she hears someone is sick and coming back to the shop. She then proceeds to fuck up in every way imaginable, crying and squealing the whole time. They cut right to Danny McBride, who says “she sounded scared. I’ve never heard her sound scared before.” Really??? Did she never stub a toe or lose her car keys in his presence??

Just a dumb, dumb movie.

JuanHamm wrote:Uhh

lennytheweedwhacker wrote:

JuanHamm wrote:Uhh

Sure take a few minutes to think it over.

JuanHamm wrote:

lennytheweedwhacker wrote:

JuanHamm wrote:Uhh

Sure take a few minutes to think it over.

I've seen neither, but I'd go with Babe. Ferngully is an annoying word.

bart wrote:

Jorge wrote:For everyone's benefit, this is the point where you know you can safely stop reading this 2001 Ain't It Cool News level post

bart wrote: It is a perfect example of the Star Wars/Marvel-ization of everything everywhere.

I’m not familiar with 2001 era ain’t it cool news, what do you mean?

Jorge wrote:

bart wrote:

Jorge wrote:For everyone's benefit, this is the point where you know you can safely stop reading this 2001 Ain't It Cool News level post

bart wrote: It is a perfect example of the Star Wars/Marvel-ization of everything everywhere.

I’m not familiar with 2001 era ain’t it cool news, what do you mean?

They used to post reviews very similar to yours, focusing on stuff like character choices, laced with sarcasm and with a kind of indignant tone to them

bart wrote:

Jorge wrote:

bart wrote:

Jorge wrote:For everyone's benefit, this is the point where you know you can safely stop reading this 2001 Ain't It Cool News level post

bart wrote: It is a perfect example of the Star Wars/Marvel-ization of everything everywhere.

I’m not familiar with 2001 era ain’t it cool news, what do you mean?

They used to post reviews very similar to yours, focusing on stuff like character choices, laced with sarcasm and with a kind of indignant tone to them

I don’t think my post was mainly taking aim at character choices, it was about the writing as a whole. Which I found to be completely stupid and derivative of a number of recent movies, without adding anything interesting of its own.