Red Mosquito

Call her your womanfriend.

But I already call your mom that

That's not fair! I can't make yo mamma jokes back!

You can, they'll just be a lot darker

This is indeed an irrational hatred. I don't see what would be wrong with calling someone your partner.

It's sterile, vague, noncommittal, timid... textbook political correctness, draining the language of color.

Extreme levels of cringe that only Burt is capable of delivering.

Burt, I say this with nothing but love. Maybe you should clean your surfaces, change your light bulb, get some nice shelves, and find a partner before you worry about stuff like this.

LoathedVermin72 wrote: Fri June 05, 2026 11:27 pm Burt, I say this with nothing but love. Maybe you should clean your surfaces, change your light bulb, get some nice shelves, and find a partner before you worry about stuff like this.

There's no time!

If you've been together for years and you live together and you share a life with each other, but you're not married for whatever reason, it just feels a little, I dunno, minimizing? Trivializing? to say girlfriend. Like we're still sneaking around making out after school. I know that's not true for everyone, just kinda how it started feeling to me after a while

It's passionate. You aren't engaged in a business enterprise for chrissakes. Express your love!

"Girlfriend" doesn't really sound particularly passionate either

Burt catching a barrage of Ls

As a compromise, I propose only being allowed to call her your "partner" if you are a cowboy. And yes, you must wear a cowboy hat.

So yeah, like I said. Unfuckable.

BurtReynolds wrote: Fri June 05, 2026 11:49 pm As a compromise, I propose only being allowed to call her your "partner" if you are a cowboy. And yes, you must wear a cowboy hat.

How about paramour

My head is too large for most cowboy hats

Partner is just the politically correct, professional, totally average way to say it. I tend to think it is the best term in most cases.

But partner is too intense a word for someone your monogamous mate that you don't share finances, a home, or make major life decisions with. Girlfriend and boyfriend are two of my least favorite words, but partner isn't a good replacement for those terms in the early and less intense phases.

Fucking autistic j*w take

The Argonaut wrote: Sat June 06, 2026 12:21 am But partner is too intense a word for someone your monogamous mate that you don't share finances, a home, or make major life decisions with. Girlfriend and boyfriend are two of my least favorite words, but partner isn't a good replacement for those terms in the early and less intense phases.

Fuckbuddy can work. It has a romantic feel to it.