Red Mosquito

BurtReynolds wrote:

This movie is (of course) terrible, but kinda interestingly bad. Ok, it's not that interesting either, but this movie is definitely weird. I already hate the phrase "was this written by AI?", but this genuinely felt like it was written by AI.

- The weirdest thing about this movie is that

Spoiler: show

it has a portrayal of a South American dictator that has to be seen to be believed. It's not just positive. It's downright idealized. Saintly even. It's such a bizarre choice, I can't think of something similar. I'd say it was ballsy, but it's more likely just incompetent screenwriters. One of the evil mercenary defense contractors turns out to be good guys too. Genuinely crazy plot.

- The plot is so muddled and bloated, filled with half assed little subplots and diversions. It's also way too long.
- I like John Cena, but he is not a leading man. First of all, he looks 60. And he carries himself so weird.
- Some of the most cringe comedy I've seen in awhile, and there is a lot of competition lately. It's painful watching Cena try to make this stuff work.
- Alison Brie hams it up as usual, but wow, is her character woefully detestable from start to finish, which is impressive considering her personality seems to vary from scene to scene, if not line by line. Her character acts in whatever way is needed for the plot to move forward, but always makes her look bad.
- Ugly and cheap. Amateurish action, horrible effects. I can't believe they put this in theaters.



This only sucked about 80-90% as much as I was expecting. It was mostly just boring.

- Why does Henry Cavill have that haircut? It just looks stupid and is never explained.
- The weird stylized flourishes don't work at all with the story. And it just gets more and more ridiculous as it goes. It would have worked a lot better if the real world spy stuff was treated more realistically. As it is, it's just a mess.
- none of the big twists had any meaning or emotional impact. They're just there.



After watching those two abortions, I had the urge to watch the movie that clearly inspired the first, and maybe the second. I got really depressed watching it. Modern movies are so ugly and cheap looking compared to this. This is no masterpiece or anything, but this middling 80s movie is objectively superior in almost every way except maybe sound and score. What the fuck happened to us? This movie looks great. The jungle looks muddy and dangerous. The "jungle" in Freelance looks like it was filmed in a park.

- Danny Davito looks so young.
- Michael Douglas never looked young.
- Florence Pugh kinda looks like a young Kathleen Turner. Damn she's sexy in this.

tommy wrote:I need to see Romancing the Stone.

I took my nephew to the theater for Back to the Future 2. It definitely hasn't aged quite as well as the first one, but it was still a fun time. I found it really weird that Elizabeth Shue wasn't credited in the beginning credits or at the end.

BurtReynolds wrote:

tommy wrote:I need to see Romancing the Stone.

I took my nephew to the theater for Back to the Future 2. It definitely hasn't aged quite as well as the first one, but it was still a fun time. I found it really weird that Elizabeth Shue wasn't credited in the beginning credits or at the end.

It's pretty good. I haven't seen it since the 80s, but it held up pretty well.

E.H. Ruddock wrote:

BurtReynolds wrote:

tommy wrote:I need to see Romancing the Stone.

I took my nephew to the theater for Back to the Future 2. It definitely hasn't aged quite as well as the first one, but it was still a fun time. I found it really weird that Elizabeth Shue wasn't credited in the beginning credits or at the end.

It's pretty good. I haven't seen it since the 80s, but it held up pretty well.

Romancing the Stone is a great movie!

E.H. Ruddock wrote:

BurtReynolds wrote:

tommy wrote:I need to see Romancing the Stone.

I took my nephew to the theater for Back to the Future 2. It definitely hasn't aged quite as well as the first one, but it was still a fun time. I found it really weird that Elizabeth Shue wasn't credited in the beginning credits or at the end.

It's pretty good. I haven't seen it since the 80s, but it held up pretty well.

Romancing the Stone is a great movie!

doug rr wrote:I love the originals...I refuse to watch the remakes

wease wrote:

doug rr wrote:I love the originals...I refuse to watch the remakes

They’re actually good.

doug rr wrote:

wease wrote:

doug rr wrote:I love the originals...I refuse to watch the remakes

They’re actually good.

I'll never find out

tommy wrote:

doug rr wrote:

wease wrote:

doug rr wrote:I love the originals...I refuse to watch the remakes

They’re actually good.

I'll never find out

Wease and I are going to clockwork orange you

tommy wrote:

doug rr wrote:

wease wrote:

doug rr wrote:I love the originals...I refuse to watch the remakes

They’re actually good.

I'll never find out

Wease and I are going to clockwork orange you